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I'm In Love With And Loved By A Divorcee, CONFUSED

I am a silent reader who has been visiting your blog for 2years now. And it has been an eye opener to married life even before venturing. 

Even scared of getting married because of so many bad and failed marriages but God will see me through.


Am dating this man, a divorcee with 3 kids for close to 2 years now and I have fallen completely in love with him regardless of his complicated life and I believe he is in love too. Whenever we are together I feel so happy and different (the feeling is natural). We rarely argue or quarrel.  Now he is very serious about settling down with me but am not certain this is what I want. Am scared and afraid. I have turned down his proposal about marriage before but he never gives up.

He is a very handsome, humble, caring, hardworking, very rich, romantic, very domesticated, funny, intelligent and a religious man who respects me and treats me like a queen. One of my problems are, he labelled his ex wife evil, wicked,not a good cook and she hated his family etc.


He told me he tried teaching her how to cook but she didn't learn. Of course the story is one sided and he said he has never laid his hands on her ever (domestic violence).

At the moment, the wife is tormenting him with the kids and its weighing him down. I haven't met any of his cute children at all.


A friend's friend told me he was constantly cheating on his ex wife with this particular girl. Even to the
extent that they attended functions together.  I dont know whether it is true cos that was before I met him and I haven't caught him cheating (or maybe he is now a changed person), although he is extremely smart . But he seemed to have realized his mistakes from the past and wants to make amends.


Well to cut it short, I am confused and I need smart  and matured answers whether am on the right part. According to him, the marriage was annulled from the vactican. Also that his wife who he can afford to buy a bag of 500k was the one that left by herself. So I keep wondering why a woman who was this comfortable would leave her marriage. It makes no sense or maybe they fall out of love?


Am not after his money, I want to be happy in my marriage but I really love him.
And I dont want to be labelled a husband snatcher or fight with his kids tomorrow. GOD FORBID

Kim.

Comments

  1. Anonymous7/21/2014

    If you really love him don't be discourage by what pp are saying. But take your time and don't rush into anything. You don't really know a man until you start living with them, keep your eyes wide open. Good luck x

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous7/21/2014

    My advice to you is to investigate and find out the real reason him and his wife got divorced so you dont enter one chance if possible get someone to talk to her or better still ask for the divorce papers, both sides usually tell their story. I was once in a relationship with a divorcee and he told me all sorts of stories about his wife. One faithful day he didn't log out of his email on my laptop and i stumbled on the divorce documents turns out my guy was a chronic wife beater and used to fight her over very silly issues he even admitted in the documents that he beat her on one occasion even though she claims he beat her on several occasions

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7/22/2014

      Is hs name george chinda

      Delete
  3. Anonymous7/21/2014

    If you love him my dear follow your heart and marry him. People will say all manner of things but your opinion and feelings for him matter most. Some women no matter how comfortable they are in marriage, if they are bad, they are bad. There is someone I know currently going thru hell in his own house now cos of the woman he spent so much to marry even with all the provisions. Some women are really out to make their husbands miserable. I keep asking, why did u marry him when u knew u don't love him Its possible the woman actually left the marriage its not all divorces that men initiate.Some divorcees are better than some so called single guys in sheep clothing. Pls if u love him,go ahead. Cheers.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous7/21/2014

    Lol.. divorcee?? Y? I pity d woman dt will marry my ex husband.. I wouldn't even wish him on my enemy, d punishment would be too much. Please find out Y o, I use God name beg u if not OYO is ur case..

    ReplyDelete
  5. My dear, don't judge based on d story he told u alone... Try and do some secret investigations urself.. Try and find out what really happened btw him and his ex wife before u conclude....

    ReplyDelete
  6. Pls who knows the blog of that divorced Nigerian lady that blogs about her life when she was married...Please I really miss reading her blog...aunty Eya please you can help with this...I think I got to know her blog from yours...thanks

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is it kool blend blog?? Is she divorced now?

      Delete
    2. Kool blend, is she divorced?

      Delete
  7. Anonymous7/21/2014

    pls poster be very careful ok.like the rest have said try and do some investigations before u conclude to marry him.dont rush.all d best dear

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hmn poster. This story sounds sooo familiar. Please be careful. He sounds too smooth. And I'm guessing there are some things your instinct is alerting you about. Why wouldn't you have met his kids and he's been proposing?
    Please does he mainly reside in Port Harcourt, Nigeria ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7/21/2014

      Poster where you?
      Reply cruss please. Is he based in PH?

      Delete
  9. Anonymous7/21/2014

    Men are desperate o so find out why his marriage broke down so you don't enter am, forget love o

    ReplyDelete
  10. Be careful. There is more to the story than meets the eye. Dig deeper.

    How to install your own crochet braids

    ReplyDelete
  11. Do a background check of his previous marriage why it failed. Are u really sure u want 2 settle with dis man despite being a divorcee with children? Dig more info frm that frnd that told u abt his former wife. I want 2 believe ur mom or an elderly person in ur family could be reached for an advice. After all these assignment I have given 2 u ask ur§elf if really ur marriage 2 dis divorcee will work. The truth usually is dat most divorcees only take another wife 2 take away burdens either of kids,kitchen tinz etc and still continue with their bad ways...look well well bfor u leap 2 avoid stories dat touch so hard!

    ReplyDelete
  12. @poster sniff this divorcee out....I don't want u 2 get hurt...do it biko!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous7/21/2014

    Long throat for money,single ladies sha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7/23/2014

      U are stupid for calling out single ladies. To think ur mom,sisters,aunties and u were once single ladies.

      Delete
    2. Shhhhhhhhh

      Delete
  14. Chioma7/21/2014

    Madam poster,I take your name beg you, leave other women husbands alone and go search more.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7/23/2014

      Didn't u snatch ebi's husband 2 be? If u open dat ur stinking mouth too much,I will simply expose u with strong strong evidence. Anu mpam

      Delete
  15. The poster7/22/2014

    @Cruss, No dear not in PH
    @ Anonymous 10:35 and Chioma, you you guys are sick and she-goats and you need help. I am very comfortable where I am. When I said smart answers I wasn't referring to people like you........ Mscheww
    @Her Excellency and other good people, I thank you so much. I have actually discussed it with my mom and she was particular about the fact that he has sons. And since the Ex is still alive, she will use them to torment me. One thing I love about him is his humility despite his wealth and his matured mind, but like some people said love can turn to hatred when there is so much crisis and there is more to the one sided story. Well such is life......... I really appreciate. Muahhhhh.


    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7/22/2014

      there is a problem when a grown man labels his ex wife and mother his children evil, not a good cook (huh?), wicked bla bla bla. there is something yoruba people call bi boni lasiri. if you marry him, dont tell him all your secrets
      secondly, that vatican annulment story sounds like hogwash, it probably is
      im not saying these things because he is a divorcee.... most of them are angels next to some never married men
      do your private investigation, i can smell miles away that this man is not entirely kosher

      Delete
    2. Anonymous7/25/2014

      Poster ur a fool and a bitch dats why u can't find a single guy dat will marry u.Coming here to curse pple out.Am very sure ur mother is a second wife 4 her 2 even support u.Disgusting sets of mufus.U pple r d problem we married women have.Sleeping around wit married men under say he's a divorcee. Wat were u doing wen ur age mates were getting married??? Better leave dat man alone to go back 2 his family or else.......... Ur warned. Ashewo kobo kobo,old dirty razzoid, Onye oshi amu.

      Delete
  16. Anonymous7/22/2014

    Hmmmmmm. He could be related to Dino

    ReplyDelete
  17. Anonymous7/22/2014

    Hmmmmmm. He could be related to Dino

    ReplyDelete
  18. Anonymous7/23/2014

    Oh boy! I know him!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Brenda7/23/2014

      Liar, how d u know him? SMH

      Delete
  19. Anonymous7/23/2014

    Poster does his name starts with K?

    ReplyDelete
  20. Anonymous7/23/2014

    See this fool insulting pple.
    Pls go marry d man and wat eva u see jst take it cos he really fits a razz ewu like u.
    I do nt support anon but chioma is so so right. Leave married men alone.
    U r d prob we v in ds world.
    Desperate mucheche
    U must come frm a very razz family for ur mum to support u
    Razz girl met razz dude equal razzodites.

    Osochi egbu
    Leave pples husband alone and go search fr urs
    Second hand okirika

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7/23/2014

      Are all these insults necessary really? Why can't we learn to comport ourselves in real life and online as well? It's quite unbecoming

      Delete
    2. Anonymous7/23/2014

      Razz housewife @anony 7:53

      Delete
  21. Anonymous7/23/2014

    hahahahha! I love this! raw truth.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Poster7/23/2014

    @ Anon 11:36 pm and 8:26, no he is not Dino neither does him name start with a K.
    And for anon 7:53, my mom didn't support me and I know come from a more responsible home than you do. I am not desperate, if I was I wouldn't have turned his first marriage proposal down.
    I understand your anger, you are so miserable in your marriage but God will see you through. Please stop pouring your frustration on others. You can write your story here so people can help you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7/23/2014

      My dear forget dat anonymous 7:53....she is very much insane

      Delete
  23. Poster7/23/2014

    I have thought about it and I think I should let go and concentrate on my other suitors.
    Thank you so much everybody even those that were harsh but still saying the truth.
    Am happy I let this out.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Anonymous7/23/2014

    Awwww.my dear poster
    I am very very far frm being miserable dear
    Go and find ur own husband dearest aunty gwegwegwe and save us stories dt touch d hrt in d near future cos his wife wl surely come after u
    Dearest agbaya,go on ur knees and ask God for ur own man and stop commiting adultery.go and read matt 19 vs9 and matt 5:32 and see what d bible said concerning desperados like u.
    Am off to go prepare special catfish peppersoup fr darlyn hub. Aunty eya,i wl try and send u pix later.I knw dear poster wl definitely attack me on my peppersoup post.hehehey

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous7/23/2014

      U are miserable biko. If someone comes here with her problem for us 2 solve it shouldn't give room for insults and bad wordz...help dat person with d advice that will better his or her life....'he who asks question doesn't miss road'. I pray that ur pepersoup turns out bad for all these ur nonsense comment! Poster don't mind her jor.

      Delete
  25. Anonymous7/23/2014

    Vatican loun loun

    ReplyDelete
  26. Hmmm,Anony 10:35,7:53,4:51, I believe that in any nonsence they is sence but will make more sence if well spelt,all those insult where not necessary and to u my dear pooster,two wrong can not make a right,u don't hv to answer back at any insult,if u hv to answer back at any insult then answer wisely anyway the deed has been done but speak wisely cos that is the only way u will survive trauma if u eventaully marrries this man cos people will always critisize u,back to the matter,for u not to have seen his children means a lot but let me not just go there cos u outh to have make effort to know ur step sons to be,as others said,dig deeper for reasons why he divorced a woman who willinly gave him 3sons and as for ur last question if u will be labelled a husband snacher, my answer is a big YES cos he is a womans husband but u will not be if and only the woman Is really the cause of the divorce,just put ur self in that womans shoe and ask ur self that question,as for if the kids will fight u is still a Bigger yes cos u take away their joy unless their Daddy beats their mother infront of them.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Anonymous7/23/2014

    'anonymouses' aka miss poster and her group of 2nd hand wives,sorry my peppersoup was da bomb.the truth hurts but i wl make sure i continue to flog u wt d truth.
    I repeat pls leave a married man alone
    Embrace God and ask Him to pls show u ur own husband cos u r currently holding someone elses own. If u pray sincerely,sure he wl answer u. Eziokwu na agba agba na nti. I v ur time dear cos am on mat leave. So i guess we r keeping each other company. Ur type stinks

    ReplyDelete
  28. Anonymous7/24/2014

    Anon 7:04,7:06 and7:01 is the poster replying people. U are asking for solution but cant stand d real truth. Thread carefully pls cos men are so good in lying.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Please look before you leap how can a man with all this good qualities divorce his wife just because she cant Cook or do house chores. I doubt it. don't be the next victim. Maybe that lady was right. There most be a very strong problem before divorce can be the only option. Most hay while the sun shines

    ReplyDelete

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