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When Is It Ok To Assist My Fiance Financially?

Good morning Aunty Eya, I love the good work you are doing with your blog. May God help and uphold your own home.
Aunty pls I have this questions which I will like others to contribute to, the question is, is it good for one's boyfriend not yet a fiance to be asking the lady for financial assistance. For instance he wants to buy a car, he asked the lady to help him raise some cash, he wants to get an accommodation, he asked the lady to help with some cash. Although he promised to pay back, but the ones he is still owing he has not even paid back. If yes at what stage can we say it is okay. And when can we say it is too early? Especially if the lady is the type that does not ask him for any financial assistance (not as if she is financially okay).
Please keep me anonymous... thanks ma... looking forward to your reply.

Comments

  1. Anonymous2/22/2014

    I really hate it when men are so comfortable with asking for financial help from their girlfriends! Even if he is so cash strapped, he should try to raise the needed support on his own. Even if she sees that he is struggling and offers her support, shame suppose catch him na!
    Men of nowadays and their feelings of entitilement. I will run from a guy who is comfortable with always 'borrowing' from me even when he hasn't proposed. If we are married, it's a different matter. If I support my hubby I am ensuring my future. But boyfriend, mba!

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  2. Throughout my courtship to marriage for 2 years, I never gave my husband more than 10k.He even found it extremely difficult asking me for the money and paid it back within a week. I cannot give any man other than my husband money. Even my husband has to prove himself worthy of my money. If he cheats and treats me badly, I will never except the project benefits me or my kids directly.

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  3. Fyn Ijebu Chic2/22/2014

    Borrow kini?
    I cannot lend such a person money ooo
    One of my brothers is fond of not returning when he borrows, I shaparly stopped lending him... Ewo l'osi
    Poster, dnt borrow except it's for business and in such case, I'll rather be a partner, we gats sign all necessary papers. I dnt want story that touches.
    I be proper ijebu girl and as hardworking as we are, we no dey give lazy men our money.

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous2/22/2014

      Open ur eyes he is a goggle they are every where befor he ask u for money tell him u don't hav

      Delete
  4. Anonymous2/22/2014

    But don't you know that's how scammers operate..........he will definitely put a ring on it and tell you all the lovey doves stuff to make you open your legs and account.

    My sister, it has happened to me....this is not reported gist. Straight from horses mouth.


    The answer to your question is after he has taken you to the altar infront of God and man. Shikena.

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  5. Anonymous2/22/2014

    its not okay @al.this is how it will always be if u dont take ur stand now.if u let it continue n u two eventually marry,it will bcome worse.i had a bf like dt,i use to even like to help hm,til he borrowed a huge sum n neva paid me bk.even hs sister did same.i didnt need a prophet to tell me when to leave.i sat down evaluated everything i realise my dads moni will b used to service their family.i am now married n i love somuch sharing what i have wt myhubby bcos he s a very hardworking man n he can do anything for me n d kids..be wise

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  6. Anonymous2/23/2014

    Mmmmmmm! My darling sister, abeg u don stArt wetin no go end ooo! If u marry dis guy, u will end up doing more than u r doing right now. Cos in his silly mind, u have money! Pls it was not right, is not and will never be. I have a very close aunty, who was like u and ended up with d man, she had a good job and she was practically changing Naira to Pounds to her kidz, guess what, her husband was in d UK with the kids ooo, in a house she pays the rent! My dear sister d tori long! Run

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  7. Agatha Christi2/23/2014

    A guy that is so comfortable asking you for money is not to be trusted. So my dear I will say shine your eyes. Learn to ask him too! Maybe because you don't ask. He feels you have more than enough. If you ask and he doesn't give you, he will not be bold enough to ask you next time and if he is after what he will get from you he will run away! In another news another news today is my birthday,hmm I av to take a life changing step this week remember me in your prayers!.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hbd Agatha...May the lord continue to direct your path..*cheers

      Delete
    2. Happy Birthday sis

      Delete
  8. Anonymous2/23/2014

    Dear Poster;

    Form a sincere heart i say NO. From the look of things sef (since you said you are not even financially buoyant) i hope you are not borrowing money for him.

    A man should be a man. IF he cant afford a car, then he should not buy it. You need to run away from this guy and if you cant run away, you must form "I AM FOREVER BROKE". He must not know nyour actual income, he myust feel like you have a million school fees to pay at home. Let him know you dont have any kobo.

    To make it more interesting, start asking him for money too. I am so broke, i need a few cash to get by the month. Lets see his reaction. DON'T GIVE HIM YOUR MONEY EVER.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous2/23/2014

    My dear your story sounds so familiar. It has sure happened to me.thank God it did not end in marriage. I helped him raise money for business that I never saw proceeds.gave him money for car etc. When he started coming up with house rent issues na dia I come get sense. Before he opens his mouth to talk, I will give a whole bunch of complains on financial constraints faced. That's where his character changed towards me and later told me he has someone else.
    Babe if you are in PH let me know o! It might be the same guy. Let me save a sister.
    Dear WC fam, the story of my life is long o.but thank God I have recovered from the shock.

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  10. Tochini Beads2/23/2014

    Never give a man money untill he has put a ring on it infront of men and God. He just wants to milk you and walk.. A real man that cherishes you will never ask you for money..

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  11. Anonymous2/23/2014

    Thanks Aunty Eya for posting this... and thank you all for your comments.
    POSTER

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous2/23/2014

    God forbid bad thing. Dnt just try it at all .

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous2/23/2014

    Thanks Aunty Eya for posting this... and thank you all for your comments.
    POSTER

    ReplyDelete
  14. Johnson2/23/2014

    Please run from a man that is bold enough (and shameless enough) to ask you for money - esp when you're not married to him.
    It's different when you're the one volunteering to assist financially...

    ReplyDelete
  15. Fyn Ijebu Chic2/23/2014

    Doctor Zaza and his/her cohorts,
    No make me read psalms for your head ooo
    What can fa all these spells and castings?
    Pls take your unwanted advert to where it is needed, we do not need such here.
    We are children of the MOST HIGH.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Pls ao much did you pay for him to cast spells? Abeg make una park well o... Dr. Zaza ko? Dr. Zero ni... scammers oshi... mtwuuueeeech!!!!

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  17. How can you scammer just post simultaneously with different names. You are highly unprofessional. Oloshi!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Pls ao much did you pay for him to cast spells? Abeg make una park well o... Dr. Zaza ko? Dr. Zero ni... scammers oshi... mtwuuueeeech!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  19. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. this is fetish and voodoo!!!as a christian (or are you not) you should go to God in prayers for strength and sustenance not to consult with magician,dibias and ifa priests.and your are even inviting others to join you?completely derailing from the topic of the day with this? fellow wcm pls ignore this and pray for her

      Delete
    2. Anonymous2/24/2014

      Nonsense and rubbish testimony...........why are you promoting witch craft

      Delete
  20. wake up from this slumber my dear.you digging your own grave.do you have all that money to throw away?then use it on the less privileged and people with various sicknesses without any hope of paying their hosp bills and be rewarded abundantly by the good Lord.people like us in marital relationship done waste our money like that on our hubby bc of thought of him using it on another woman not to talk of boy friend/fiance level.run as far as your legs can carry you.cars and accommodation kee?that your not even sure of leaving in or driving?you can as well go to his village while on it and build a house for him.be wise and shine your eyes well well jo.

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  21. Shirley2/25/2014

    Dear Poster, i will believe u are a learner. how can u be giving money to a mere boyfriend? u no wise at all, abi na desperation for marriage? Babe, shine ur eyes...

    ReplyDelete
  22. Anonymous2/28/2014

    Very interesting pieces. Much as I agree to all , but is it ok for a guys to give money to their girlfriends?

    ReplyDelete

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