What it means when YOU are being taken for granted

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When you are taken for granted, it means your value is being underestimated. You are expected to always be available, to serve without needing a 'thank you', an appreciation. In short you are being taken for granted when people or someone expects you to serve without needing recognition/acknowledgement. When try as you may, give until you have nothing more to give yet, you are seen as ''after-all you are doing what you should be doing" You go all out of your way to render some services yet that recognition is not given you and you are wondering why? Just know that YOU ARE BEING TAKEN FOR GRANTED.  Your value is not appreciated or, you are not even valued by whoever it is you are serving.

To be honest, so many people feel they are being taken for granted but are not really sure. Now, here are signs to prove that you are truly not valued either by an individual; husband, wife, In-laws, friends, family and the list goes on.

  1. Your presence is ignored especially in the presence of other people. Your spouse invites friends over and doesn't remember to offer you a glass. A friend treats you with respect only in private and as soon as you are joined by others, she shifts her loyalty and indirectly makes you look like the third wheel; you are being taken for granted.
  2. If you are always the one initiating contact, you are always the one starting the conversation and looking for ways to make the relationship stronger. If you are the one always trying to make contact then it automatically means you are not the focal point of the other person's life and honestly, if someone genuinely wants to talk to you, they'll find a way under any circumstance.
  3. Your kindness, your good nature, your good heart is being used and abused, they are comfortable and have become accustomed to you going the extra mile in the relationship, you buying gifts, you planning romantic moments, you doing all what not to please them. You are the only one that apologizes after an argument sometimes even when it's clear you are not wrong.They are so used to that way and feel you will never leave them and as such do not even give a moment to thoughts about you. They know that when it comes to them, the word NO doesn't exist in your dictionary, that you will always be there to give and to do for them.
  4. No appreciation; No reciprocation. Your positive traits are ignored and only mistakes get magnified. In a marriage, you are the only one making an effort with your appearance, trying to look good for your spouse who doesn't care if s/he gains all the weight in the world or looks inappropriate in public.
  5. You are being taken for granted if when you do something, it's WRONG, but when another does that exact same thing, it's ok.
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Do you know you are the reason for your being taken for granted?
  • Your lack of self respect and low self-esteem. You constantly do things for them thinking that will earn you their love and adulation. 
  • You cannot say what and how you feel. You just cannot say NO.
  • You are very predictable and they can see through you. There are no surprises from you, they can tell your next move and so it's easy to manipulate you.
  • You are always working to impress because you want them to like you. You are willing to bend sideways, forward, backwards and any direction at all just to please them. You are sweet and even too sweet because all you want is to be liked.
  • You are unable to take decisions or pass/make judgments independently, you are just perpetually dependent and clingy.

Now, here is the question: How do you end being taken for granted?