Hello ma, I had an abortion four years ago and thought I had gotten over it. I was 24 years old, we were planning our wedding and I didn't want to be seen as a pregnant bride. Although my husband (then fiance) tried to convince me to leave it, I couldn't stand what other church members will think of me when I give birth earlier than 9 months after the wedding. "I'm in the church choir, what would they think of me" how will they start treating me afterwards?". Our courtship was seemingly very strict as my church has rules about all these things, what would they say if 6, 7 months after the wedding they receive news I gave birth to a baby that doesn't even look premature? 
I went ahead and secretly did it. 

Let me not lie, I was haunted after the wedding, I never thought another
pregnancy would come so fast but it did come and now we have a beautiful, energetic baby girl but the guilt is killing me. I can't take this thought off my head, I keep feeling like I murdered my own child because of a mere church wedding. I have prayed and fasted but the thoughts still return. I hate to pass around the hospital area where it happened. Aunty Eya please help me ask the wives connection family if I need to go make a confession to my pastor so the thoughts would leave me alone, I'm tired.


  1. I was born in a catholic church, I attend a pentecostal church now, but when it comes to confession I go to any catholic church around me because the pastor in charge of the place I used to worship uses people's confession against them and in fact anytime u don't do what its expected of you, ur name ll be mentioned in church.

    Though I was never a victim of this cos I used other people's experience.
    Can you trust him with such confession if no, check any catholic church around.

    Remain bless!

  2. Hmmmm....well, you need to get this off your chest but as New Jwel said about going to a Catholic church for confession, I really don't know since maybe you weren't born catholic. I'm Catholic and I normally go for confessions and yes, your secret is safe there and you are asked to pray and truly repent of your sins. That aside, if you have a good pastor in your church who you know won't reveal it to people, you should go to him or her and let the burden off your chest.
    I really hope you've learnt from your mistakes about letting the opinions of others influence your decision in life. I won't be surprised if some members also did get pregnant before their wedding and hid it so well that no one knew.

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  3. May you find the peace you need, thanks for telling our story. I say so,because it is mine too,the only difference is i kept her, and i was a very heavily pregnant bride. She's two now,. I hope that someone who's in this situation presently learns. Pls, forgive yourself

  4. For those who put their cylinders in the balcony please how do you protect it from rain and sunshine? Do you make a cover for it and if so, what kind of covering? THANKS.

    1. Mine is outside. I don't think rain and sun affects it.
      I have seen a protected one somewhere. In a small hut that looks like a dog kennel but a bit spacious and padlocked. The carpenters know what to construct.

    2. Mine is outside. I do not think rain or sun affects it. I've seen a protected one somewhere around my neighbourhood, in a small netlike hut like a dog's kennel, padlocked. The carpenters know what to construct.

  5. Since u ain't a Catholic u can't go there for confession except u ready to turn to 1. Thank God amma Catholic. #myopinion. As for @poster if you sure your pastor won't spell it out den go to him n confess

    1. She can.
      I asked.
      You can come for confession but you can't receive communion until u re baptised.

  6. Personally i don't think its until you go to some priest for confession before God forgives you. You can actually go to God yourself and yes the guilt and all that will come afterwards(i doubt if the thoughts will go away totally) but as long as you have that one on one relationship with God you can go boldly to his throne of grace where you can obtain mercy(HEBREWS 4:16)
    Also never ever let the opinion of people cause you to sin. No 1, you engaged in premarital sex which is wrong to top it all you had an abortion. pls pls an pls.....ladies should ABSTAIN. There is alot of joy from that. it also makes the wedding night VERY SPECIAL.
    @Poster, the devil will still try to torment you with the memory of the child you aborted but once you"ve talked to God about it and he has forgiven you, then you have nothing to worry about.

  7. Ok Ma. Thanks. I'll talk to my carpenter now.

  8. See a Catholic priest

  9. Anonymous6/07/2016

    I just read your post, come out of that guilt. Open up to your pastor if you can trust him that she/he will minister to you and correct you. If such a man of God decide to tell people, you have freed your conscience. You don't need to see a strange pastor who does not know anything about you. Don't keep secret with the devil, if you feel comfortable talking to genuine Women of God, watch Joy of every woman on Kingdom Africa between 9:30 -10pm every day. God has forgiven you

  10. mrs tam3/25/2017

    madam there are some secret u should take to your grave.ask God for forgiveness and Learn from your mistake. start by forgiving yourself and be repentant. at least hubby married you at d end.confess to God.he's not deaf my dear.


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