Should I Move On Or Wait For The Love Of My Life To Become Single?

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courtesy: healthyblackmen.

Hello Mrs Eya, I need honest advice from the wives connection on the blog, kindly help me post this anonymously. My fiancee broke up with me because of a very small mistake I made on campus of which I promised her it won't happen again but she won't listen. We did not say a word to each other for three months, then suddenly she started begging again that she believes it was a mistake that I'm not wayward and all that. At that time she came begging, I
was already writing my final year examination and feeling myself, maybe that's the reason I didn't cool down to listen and just insisted that since she broke up with me, she should just move on.

I left, she continued and we didn't see again until she came home for holiday. Our families live in the same town not very far from each other. Seeing her now makes me want to be with her for the rest of my life. I went to see her and asked for forgiveness, and expressed my feelings but she said that even though she forgiven me, that she has someone already but that she strongly believes we will end up together. I believe too that we will end up together, She says the timing is not right at the moment.

My dilemma here is I really love her but I'm clearly her second option. I don't know whether to pursue her or just move on. I tried talking to other girls but I just get so sad at the fact that I'm talking to someone who is not the one I love. Before you tell me to move on just for the fact that she doesn't want me at this moment, I really truly believe she is the one. the amount of love she use to have for me was crazy and the amount of love I have for her now is greater than some husbands have for their wife's of many years. We use to click so well ,the only reasons things did not workout was because of myself but I changed and truly matured.
 To be honest it doesn't even bother me that I'm basically her second option because I know for fact I'm better than her current guy. We were engaged, they are not.  It's also very clear that things are most likely not going to work out with her new guy as they already having problems. What is the proper thing for me to do? I really want to wait until she is single.


  1. Hi, good evening, sorry I couldn't connect yesterday, just posted your mail on the blog this evening. Your story is not easy to understand oh. What's the little mistake you made on campus? If it's about other women, then it isn't a small mistake. Do you think it wise to wait with no guarantee? Even though you guys were engaged, I think you let her slip through your fingers and that's in the past now. Maybe you didn't behave like you value her. Telling you to wait is not the best. If she truly loves you more, why can't she just break up with him already and run into your open arms. If you move on, that might be the best decision because you are not getting younger. I don't know if waiting for her is advisable.

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  3. I dont think its wise to keep waiting for what you are not sure of. She is with someone else but telling you both of you will end up together, when? Now you are praying that the relationship should break so you can be with her. Hope someone else will not pray that prayer for you in future too. Its hard to not be with the one your heart craves for but remember she came begging you refused. She may just be the one laughing last now and will kaugh best if you dont move on. You would have waited, turning down the opportunity for someone else to come in then finally realise you cant eat your cake and have it. Time waits for no man. If she still loves you and wants you, she would have left her present guy and come to you. Guy move on.

  4. Johnson5/01/2016

    Brother, the way you talk about love & maturity shows you still have a long way to go. "Your love for her now is greater than some husbands have for their wife's of many years". Really? That's what I call infatuation.
    Though there are many gaps in the story line, I will make some assumptions based on personal experience:
    1. She was a novice when you guys were in school...
    2. U broke her heart but now she's with a guy that's not treating her as nice as you would. She's hooked bcos water don pass under bridge...
    Her relationship with the new guy might not last but I don't see her feeling comfortable with you anymore, even though she might still have feelings for you. You are not a second option but a last option if all fails. It is best for you to move on and focus on your future career...


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