Can Anyone Here Help Me Get my love Back?

Good afternoon Mrs Eya, I have been a silent reader of wives connection and it is my first time posting on this blog asking for help.
My love and I were together for two and half years. a little history on it; we are always happy together, loving, having fun, and in each other's presence a lot. (we are a couple that just loves spending time together) the problems we've had are
mostly because of me. ive had self insecurities my whole life and its caused me to be arrogant, completely insecure and distrusting/ jealous, and probably the biggest of all seeking attention. ive sought attention from guys and girls for a kind of self approval I guess.

I've since completely gotten God back into my life and am working very hard on changing these qualities and it is going well. however, around the first of October my love asked for some space because she was crumbling under all the hurt I've given to her in the past two years. (seeking attention, flirting! I was so stupid!!) I respected that and gave her the space, but in the middle of October I got into an okada motorcycle accident and she was at my bed side almost the whole time at the hospital.that really was my chance to start again but I screwed it up bad!! 

That night we were at the pharmacy getting my drugs when some random woman sitting by us overheard us talking about the accident and popped in a few words of consolation , instantly I soaked up the attention right in front of my woman! as soon as I did it and we began to walk away I started apologizing but it was too late. the damage was done.

 We spent the night together for the next couple nights and she took care of me but I could feel the distance growing. she then asked for space again a few days after the accident and I gave her space. a week later she breaks up with me saying she cannot heal when we spend all this time together and that the issues haven't changed. two weeks after we break up I see a picture of her with her new boyfriend, a coconuthead that is nothing like me, doesn't have anything in common with her. we have taken breaks before (short of maybe two weeks but never with anyone else.)

 I was going to propose to her this Christmas.  We have planned our wedding and our children within the next year and a half. I know she loves me and I love her, I know we are meant to be! ive always talked about changing and told her I would but never showed her I was. now I am changing this immature behavior and will do anything to have her back. I would treat her like gold, although I should've in the first place. I tried contacting her every few days or so after the break up for about a week then thought she would like space. we still have clothes, etc at each others houses and each others house keys. please help me get the love of my life back!! I'm very ready to do anything you say f it will help me get her back.

Comments

  1. Hello poster. Morning. You see I rarely comment on light issues like yours on aunty Eya's blog, this is so because when compared to some other serious issues yours is light. Now to the point and will be a bit blunt so please don't be offended. Good that you know you are the cause of the problem, and really you have not worked on your self. From your narrative you are a bit childish and don't understand women at all and so should postpone the thought of marriage for at least a couple of years more while you study the specie called woman. What helped me in arriving at this view is your description of the man you saw with her in the picture. Serious women looking for a life partner wants good looks, however for real women that is not on the front burner, rather a caring man with good prospects (note I said prospect because he might not even be there yet but she can see he has focus on making it...) and not too flirty with the fear of God at least a little if not much are more like what they look for. So your lambasting the guys' physical attributes is a big error while the guy is sweeping your beau off her feet with qualities you cant see. I am sure you have heard women are not driven by sight as much as men. So settle down, read through this write up as many times as possible, pick the harsh points and work on them, then pray your lady still has one leg on the ground when you try to work your way back. Don't even mention the other guy, just come on softly with light visits probably with someone/friend you both know and let her gradually see a new you. I wish you luck if you are able to win her back (maybe the guy in the pic was just to kick start you into realizing you might loose her), but if she has moved on then you better move on too albeit with the lessons you have learnt. All the best.

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  2. Spot on advice Iche Bafe!
    Poster, do take note of the advice above!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Young man, this kind thing happened to me, mine was more comprehensive and compounded than yours. My ex was more into the 20% bad of me than the 80% good side. She told me to "move on", to be honest with you God used the situation to bring a great change into my life. If she comes back appreciate her, do away with childish acts. You need to do away with the old man inside you, you need to renew your mind. You can watch Tyler Perry film " I don't want to do wrong" and also get a book title "Act like a lady - think like a man". Am sure they will help.your mistakes is hitting you hard now. If she comes back fine, if she refused I hope you learned your lesson going into the future.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Young man, this kind thing happened to me, mine was more comprehensive and compounded than yours. My ex was more into the 20% bad of me than the 80% good side. She told me to "move on", to be honest with you God used the situation to bring a great change into my life. If she comes back appreciate her, do away with childish acts. You need to do away with the old man inside you, you need to renew your mind. You can watch Tyler Perry film " I don't want to do wrong" and also get a book title "Act like a lady - think like a man". Am sure they will help.your mistakes is hitting you hard now. If she comes back fine, if she refused I hope you learned your lesson going into the future.

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  5. Go with everyone's advice @poster

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  6. Thank you everyone for your advices. I know how childish I can be and will try to get the book and movie. I saw her a few days back and she still doesn't want to be with me.Thanksgiving anyway.

    ReplyDelete

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