He Accepted The Pregnancy, Proposed Marriage But The Problem...

Hello Anty Eya and Fellow blog readers,
I am a yoruba lady dating a guy from the south south. we met in school during our Post Graduate Diploma (PGD), he was actualy a very nice guy back in school though I never had any intention of marrring him then until...  I got home and found out I was pregnant for him. 


 i went to see him and he accepted and even proposed marriege but the problem now is i just discovered he is very clueless about life and real living all he has worked for 16yrs without saving a penny and lives in just one room!

 His daily routine is
food, sex and sleep. Anytime I wanted us to talk about moving forward he will accuse me of being disrespectful. Now, i am close to delivery and if i ask him what to do abaut baby items, he gets angry. please what do i do? do think its alright for me to move on, move back?

Comments

  1. Are your parents in support of the marriage? And what are they saying? Have you presented this issue to them before?

    Actually if you go ahead with the marriage, I am sorry you'll be babysitting both your husband and kid. Being pregnant for someone is not necessarily a straight ticket to getting married to the person, so I will suggest you give birth to the baby, nurture your baby and move on with your life if he is not ready to grow up.


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  2. Please anybody have any idea how I can return to google+, I don't know how I changed to blogger profile and I don't like it, I want to reverse back to google+ profile.


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    Replies
    1. Anonymous10/22/2014

      Sign to your Blogger Dashboard (https://www.blogger.com/home)

      2. Click the gear icon. You can select the "Revert to a Blogger profile" option from the menu.

      Delete
    2. powerpufflady10/24/2014

      Iyaa.. sorry to say this..but you need to step up your game.. your blog is becoming boring by the day.. please be creative and keep your blog alive.

      Delete
  3. Anonymous10/22/2014

    please its never too late o, thank God you are not married yet. please!!!! move out of that relationtionship and carter for your child abeg

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  4. Anonymous10/22/2014

    Ur guy has a serious spiritual problem which u cannot solve.He needs Jesus. Abeg move on with ur life

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  5. Anonymous10/22/2014

    That you are pregnant for him does not mean you should marry him

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  6. Am sorry to sound harsh, you just discovered how?!, where were you both meeting that you became pregnant? was it when you were pregnant that you visited where he was staying for the first time? Am sorry, both of you are two of a kind. Why are you making him look unserious when a grown girl like you can have careless sex with someone you have not checked out his background properly in this day and age (SMH). My people say ' someone who is making friends should make friends with someone who is good for them incase it ends up in marriage'. Suddenly now your eyes are clear, pls whatever you decide, take good care of your baby. Goodluck

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    Replies
    1. Anonymous10/29/2014

      Nice one there! A100 likes

      Delete
  7. Anonymous10/22/2014

    you can still marry him. he's getting angry at your questions because they are not questions. you are asking for money that he doesn't have so he's frustrated. doesn't make him a bad person. look at how much he has and decide how you can raise the balance. if you think he needs to save, you can help him save. some people are bad with money. my friend's husband is like that. he makes money but doesnt use it wisely. but he allowed my friend take over saving their money and spending it. she saves in a bank account with both of their names on it. and she watches every kobo they spend. he doesn't mind. you can do the same. the guy is not abusive and he's not cheating. Money is important but you have not said he doesn't work. as long as he's not lazy, you can do the rest.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous10/22/2014

    May God help u in makin a wise decision...gd evenin all...don't knw if u can also spare a paragraph 4 ma own problem too,or aunty Eya can help me open it smwhr else.I'm sori I cldnt send it 2 u,tru ma e-mail,it has been actin up 4 a while nw.I am a man engaged 2 ma fiancee,we'r gonna b doin our introduction and wedding next year.d problem nw is dt,she hails 4m Ogoja,Mbube (in Cross River state),she ws born and brut up in Lagos,her dad is late,and her mom is a Lagosian.we don't knw d tradition and custom of her people regardin introduction and traditional marriage...pls if u knw anytn abt d Mubube ppl of Ogoja in Cross River state,in regards 2 dia introduction and wedding rites,pls help me state it out here,d necessary tins 2 b brut and all...cos she does nt knw where her fathers siblings are.OR is it possible for a lady to wed according to the rite and custom of her mothers people,we'r so confused.cos we'r jst plannin 2 get sm ppl 2 stnd in 4m her father's side..tanx u all,may God bless u aunty Eya,and if u knw any1 4m dia,pls refer dem here,dy cn always comment under anonymous....Sir Emmanuel

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. powerpufflady10/23/2014

      Her mum should know her late husbands brothers.. her uncles should educate you both on the tradition and what to bring for the traditional wedding.. do you want to tell me her mum never visited her husband's place? She has no inlaws? If you are this clueless,i see no reason why you should be getting married.. na for blog you wan come collect list for traditional wedding. Nawa!

      Delete
    2. I tink it's better dt u ppl shld travel 2 her hometown n make enquiry,der is no way u won't find her route,good luck

      Delete
  9. Anonymous10/23/2014

    I feel your pain. If you have no means to support the child on your own then what will you do? Are your parents willing to support you as a single mother? Even the hardest parent change their tune when the grandchild comes along.

    He honestly does not seem like marriage material, but when u sexing a man you don't want to marry you must protect yourself times two. I am not going to knock any young woman from seeking their pleasure, but they must do so wisely especially when you are only in it for the "d". If he is not excited, or even giving you money to prepare for the child, or making plans himself for the arrival of the child, it doesn't look right to me. Talk to your mother or a wise woman openly and honestly. If you can't have simple conversation with him I do not see any future, communication is key to any successful union. If I was in your shoes I would run and don't look back, and maybe even relocate if needs be. When we women get pregnant for the wrong man it really is a burden. Go seek your way my dear, make a plan for your future and stick to it. Let this be the one child out of marriage, do not let another man sow any seed in you without dealing with you properly. God loves you, and your future can be just as bright as a childless woman if you play your cards right. Act with wisdom going forward!

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  10. Anonymous10/23/2014

    See who reverted back to come one come all,you should have left it for only id people hungry and thirsty bitch

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous10/23/2014

    Ple sister, remove ur shoes, dust the sand off them and run as fast and far as ur legs can carry u. If u decide to stay in the marriage be ready to feed him. I am saying this from experience and I wish I had stopped thinking he would change. Now I'm paying the price for blindly and stupidly falling in love cos we are married already

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  12. My dear move o. U have 1 baby to take care of. Unless you want to take care of two babies. Being pregnant doesn't necessarily mean marriage. Take care of yourself and ur baby. Your child man isn't ready.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous10/23/2014

    Move on dear. He is not worth it but that's what u get from casual sex. Just for the sake of fucking. God knows the reason why some people will just go n sleep with somebody u dnt intend marrying. The deed is done already so just turn to God for help dearie

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous10/23/2014

    @powerpufflady,tanx,d moda doesn't knw whr d uncles or aunties are,even tho she knws d place,its a lil complicated,donno aw 2 explain it,tanx 4 ur help

    ReplyDelete
  15. Anonymous10/25/2014

    What kind of responsible woman never bothered to find the whereabouts of the paternal relatives? Did it never occur to her that a time like this would come? In my opinion, she should know except they both are hiding a lot from you. As for the original poster, u've jst stated ur own version of the story. From your story, u're at least above 24. So how on earth will you decide to sleep with a man you have no intentions of settling sown with? Where did u guy have sex? In ur bed? Or at the classroom? Well, if you asked me, I'll rather you bear the consequences of your actions buy caring for your child. Being a single mum is no crime. If the father of the child is not good for you, don't try changing him cos it'll be a waste of time. Good luck with ur decision.

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  16. Anonymous10/25/2014

    Too bad you didnt pay attention to those adverts on contraception. Just too bad. Bimpe

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hi Everyone,

    A little business opportunity opened for me and I will like to get guidance on what to do.

    I got an opportunity to supply souvenirs for a wedding. I need help on gift items to advise the client on. The client doesn't have an idea what she wants. Please kindly drop ideas.

    I will also love if anyone into such business can put me thru on where they buy their items from and how they charge.

    Please help a sister.

    Thanx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous10/27/2014

      To me, the best wedding souvenirs are practical ones. While most folks go for the bookmarks, candles, chocolates, slice of cake in a box, key chain etc.. I personally prefer something a bit more practical. So for me, a small jar of honey, a small jar of spice rub - especially if it is rare and highly favored, candle holders or mini lanterns, a packet of herbs and spices - again, preferably something rare and highly favored, a set of coasters. Of course, all the suggestions need to be beautifully labelled and look pretty. Also, the client's budget will determine just how far you can go in terms of souvenirs.

      Delete
  18. Hello Mama Ijebu

    It depends on the time frame, you can make customized books, wall clock, from China with the Couple's face on it. You can even introduce customized wristband to them that will have their face on it. Or just type sourvenir on alibaba or aliexpress you might get ideas from what u will see. 4rm Dee

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tnx dee.. let me try to search on alibaba. Will come back and ask more questions if I get stuck. GOD BLESS YOU

      Delete

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