No More Love For My Husband,What Do I Do?

Hello,

Please I feel compelled to share and get advice.

I have been married for 3 years plus and I am at a point where I resent my husband and his presence irritates me.

This is an aftermath of abandonment when I was pregnant 4 months into the marriage and his repeated infidelity to the point he got someone pregnant.

I can not just bring myself to trust him and I always see an ulterior motive in all his actions.

At this point in my marriage I feel like throwing in the towel because I don't love him and care less what he is up to.

I am most happiest when I spend time with my son or when I am at work, but in his company I am aggravated.

I need advice, because I am very close to calling it quits and I know if and when I do he will not stop me from going and that seems to fuel the desire in me to end the marriage.

Mary

Comments

  1. Anonymous6/23/2014

    Dear poster, I totally understand how you feel but I won't advise you to leave your marriage except otherwise. Marriage is not easy and everybody goes through one issue or the other.
    Before I go further,
    Have your husband apologized?
    What happened to the then pregnancy?
    Did he go for std test?

    ReplyDelete
  2. You have not truly forgiven your husband and that could be because you don't think his apology was sincere.
    I keep thinking about what you must have gone through emotionally, abandoning a pregnant wife to me is the gravest offence o.
    If he is really repentant, I think you can forgive. But, chei! May God give you the strength and wisdom.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks for all your inputs, unfortunately the worst has happened, as I suspected he will never fight to keep his marriage and blames me for his infidelity instead of apologizing. he went further to say he will have another son with someone else and that I can go and requested for a divorce this morning.

      Well I will be moving on with my son and my life, looking forward to a happy single life free from the messes men bring. I so pray that my son will become one of those men that are grounded in Christ and just plain good in Jesus name. amen

      Delete
  3. Anonymous6/23/2014

    Wow this one is hard o! I think you should tell him how you feel and suggest counselling before you finally give up............but if he doesnt care after you have told him how you feel maybe you should take a walk.......

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous6/23/2014

    This is hard...May God give you wisdom to handle this and come out stronger. I believe there is nothing God cannot do. If the man is repentant, there's hope.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Not an easy one at all.
    I want to believe he didn't apologize as supposed and back it up with a good character. A cheat can say sorry and still keep late nights/stays on the phone chatting like forever.
    I'd suggest you call him and tell him how broken you still feel concerning his actions. It won't be wise to just pack out and leave without giving him any benefit of doubt.
    If he's indeed repentant I tell you he will still apologize deeply and ask you what it is he can do to prove he's a changed man but if not, he'll want to blame you for having not totally forgiven him and holding it in your heart after his flimsy sorry words.
    You feel this way coz you've taken more than you could handle especially in pregnancy(that guy get heart shaa, what an insensitive soul) and I don't blame you at all. However for the sake of your lovely son, do take one more step to restoration and if it hits the wall after you've truly/sincerely tried then you can consider seperation.
    Hope he doesn't hit you? Please if he does better borrow a band's feet.
    God be with you Sister Mary

    ReplyDelete
  6. Johnson6/23/2014

    How did he suddenly change after 3years… or has he always been like this and you refused to see the signs? Unfortunately, you cannot see anything good in what your husband does at this point…
    What could happen if you decide to call it quit?
    1. He fights back that you cannot take custody of his child
    2. He let you go and brings in another woman
    3. He suddenly becomes very sorry for his sins and begs you to stay
    4. Etc
    Separation is a very tough decision to make and the consequences are yours to bear. In this case, you would be leaving with so much bitterness and resentment in your heart. This will not do you (or your son) any good. Staying, under the current condition is also very difficult… There’s however hope for restoration of your peace and sanity – this can come only from God. Look for the movie FIREPROOF – there might be some lessons for you there. Be encouraged.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Calm down beautiful mary, have you talked to jehova? If yoou have then he will give you peace. Have you talked to your hubby about your feelings of Late? Has he apologised? Is he repentant? I Beg you not to quit just yet. In every great trial, there is advancement. I know its a hard time for you, you will overcome Mary.

    ReplyDelete
  8. It's hard to sincerely forgive, try something... Try assume that you could be the one who seriously erred. You should also understand that marriage is all about the mistakes and the makeups therein. Keep ur heart clean, help yourself, cos leaving means you starting all over with sm1 you really can't speak for, flaws are God's ways of keeping us imperfect! Be wise, Nuff'Said...

    ReplyDelete
  9. Love can sprout from nothing. Give him attention. Be humble and attractive to him the best way you can. For it takes patience to win a man and change him completely.
    http://jdy-ramble-on.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  10. Please try and forgive him for the sake of the love you have for your Son. Break up will affect your son mostly because he will end up being raise by a single parent.
    May God give you the strength to make a good decision

    ReplyDelete
  11. Good day all, sorry for the diversion.pls i need a clarification on this "http://www.wivestownhallconnection.com/2013/04/pictures-how-to-prepare-soybeans-powder.html
    by peach"
    I tried this but i noticed that it taste somehow bitter,probably it was overfried,although i added crayfish,unripe plantain and dried cat fish"
    how long should the soya beans be fried,and after it's been milled will i be boiling it together with the pap or I add it to pap like milk witout boiling it.

    please kindly assist.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did you remove the chaff?
      Aside the chaff, dunno what else could make it bitter.
      After frying make sure to ask the commercial blender operator to help you break and chaff it before grinding it to powder.
      I mix mine like milk to pad, sometimes I just mix it with SMA and water and give baby to drink

      Delete

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