This is me! Fat, Slim, Tall, Short, Fair, Thin, Dark, Black, White... This is me!!!

"To people making mean comments about my GG pics, I mos def cried about it on that private jet on my way to my dream job last night. #JK" - That was Gabourey Sidibe's response to her twitter weight critics.

In 2010, Gabourey Sidibe told Harper's Bazaar: "People always ask me, ‘You have so much confidence. Where did that come from?' It came from
me. One day I decided that I was beautiful, and so I carried out my life as
if I was a beautiful girl."  In 2012, while speaking at a women's empowerment conference, Gabourey told the young ladies in attendance: "I didn't really get to grow up hearing that I was beautiful a lot, or that I was worth anything nor did I grow up seeing myself on TV. Then at some point when I was 21 or 22 I just decided that life wasn't worth living if I wasn't happy with myself so I just took all the steps that I could to figure out how to love myself and become confident..."

This is indeed a story of courage in a world where everyone is so critical of our looks.

A few months ago, a notable Nigerian actress was alleged to have said: "I bleached my skin to save my marriage." This brings me to the question: To what extent are people willing to go for social acceptance of their physical appearance?

It is indeed very sad that the entire world is filled with unrealistic and distorted representations of people. Cosmetic surgery, botox injections, liposuction, dermal fillers and other non-surgical cosmetic procedures continue to grow in popularity all over the world. Manipulated, airbrushed and photoshopped images. We all see it every day in the print and electronic media. Daily, millions of women are bombarded with the media's idea of a "perfect" body. Unrealistic expectations for appearance which make many women to think that they are not pretty, slim, tall or charming enough.

Ladies, stop allowing unrealistic expectations of an "appropriate" body image to make you feel unhappy. You don't have to become a barbie doll to be happy. We need to be satisfied with who we are. We have to learn to love our body and appreciate our own beauty. Beware; there are lots of selfish predatory people with bullying behaviours. They are all out to ridicule you on the bases of your looks. I say this; give them no pleasure of making you feel inferior because of their own flaws, insecurities and inferiority complex.

Ladies, if you desire to lose weight, do it for yourself, do it for health reasons and not because some guy somewhere thinks you are too fat for him. Make no man the dictator of how you feel about yourself. No man should bully you into losing weight or changing your skin colour. If he thinks that you are overweight, then he should lace up his sneakers and motivate you to exercise. People who truly love you will accept you for who you are and help you to be a better person.

Body bullies out there, stop pretending that you are sincerely concerned about people's health by fat-shaming them. You are so insecure that your only stream of reassurance flows from making fun of others. If only you knew the gravity of your shameful acts and words. I tell you, it is a serious issue. As a matter fact, very serious and people have committed suicide due to being body bullied! Tallulah Wilson a 15 year old bullied schoolgirl who died after she plunged herself in front of a train, described herself as "fat", "ugly" and "worthless" in her diary. Be kind with your words!

No doubt, there is need for us to take
proper care of our bodies because they are our prized possessions. Regular hygienic practices, healthy eating habits and regular exercises are pertinent. But say NO to eating disorders, unhealthy weight loss routines, unsafe skin treatments and distorted self-image. Love the skin that you are in. It is better to be safe than sorry. Seek balance and strive for healthy improvement. We are all people and it is our differences that make us special. There is need for you to snatch your self-confidence back. Stop confusing beauty with the right to be loved. Physical beauty is not the most important thing. There is something so much more valuable and more worthy than physical beauty. It is what is inside us.

Wake up daily and say to yourself that you are beautiful, charming, ravishing and priceless. You are worth more than what your body looks like. You are WORTHY!

I leave you with the words of Steve Maraboli: "There is nothing more rare, nor more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself; comfortable in her perfect imperfection. To me, that is the essence of beauty." 

Fisayo Aransiola.

"Life is not a matter of place, things or comfort; rather, it concerns the basic human rights of family, country, justice and human dignity."


  1. Anonymous1/17/2014

    Thanks Fisayo. Is she the actress in the movie PRECIOUS?

  2. JJC MUM1/17/2014

    Sorry to deviate. Please mothers, is Johnson baby powder, cream and oil good for newborn baby skin?

    1. Anonymous1/18/2014

      u can my dear, my baby is 5months now. started usong johnson products from birth ans her skin ia perfectly fine...d new farce about shea butter has gotten every oda thing bad which i don't believe...

  3. Anonymous1/17/2014

    Fine woman. mwah!

  4. Fisayo Aransiola1/17/2014

    Thank you. Yes she made her acting debut in the 2009 film Precious

  5. heefeh1/17/2014

    No!dnt use all those baby prdts 4 new borns tilll ur baby is 3mnths!u either use olive oil,blue seal vaseline or shea butr,bath wit a baby soap buh xclude powdr n lotion till 3mnthd

  6. heefeh1/17/2014

    No!dnt use all those baby prdts 4 new borns tilll ur baby is 3mnths!u either use olive oil,blue seal vaseline or shea butr,bath wit a baby soap buh xclude powdr n lotion till 3mnthd

    1. Anonymous1/17/2014

      Yes o, shea butter did n doin wonders for my son, started from birth.


  7. Thank you for this piece Fisayo, quite uplifting.

  8. oyebola1/17/2014

    Thank u so much for dis,Fisayo...very encouraging!more sis!

  9. Tnks Fisayo, dis is beautiful and encouragin ! Keep it up.

  10. Cleo...1/18/2014

    This is hilarious, Fisayo u ve made a lot of sad dejected fat women smile with this wonderful inspiring piece of writing! God bless us all! (both Orobo/Lepa)

    1. Anonymous1/19/2014

      When you have nothing good to say, then say nothing. Olodo

  11. Anonymous1/19/2014

    Wow! thumps up Fisayo, Self confidence is the KEY!


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