Please Help A Confused Lady

Dearest Aunty Eya,

Guys pls advice:i have dis set of friends i hangout with, almost every friday; very cool guys n babe(she’s d only gurl is d group). We laf, gist, talk abt anything and mostly make fun of each oda and we do dis to ease off stress.

Anyway, of all the guys, only a few have not shown interest in me(guys being dem). Eventually, one of dem n i are now pretty

close and its “steadily” exceeding d friendship line. I like him; he is cool and just ♓☺w me like dem(dnt ask). We’ve spent sum time togeda and cos A̶̲̥̅♏‎​ no kid, i no he’d want to……! Told him i‘d like to be sure n know wat he wants n dat A̶̲̥̅♏‎​personally not interested in a fling. For sumtime, he stayed away. 

Not too long after, he started calling again and we’ve been friends (just friends) and once in a while he still “tries his luck” and A̶̲̥̅♏‎​ still on my stand “no commitment, no sex”. And that even if we start a proper relationship, i‘d need some more time( i mean, why d rush?).

Now, the thing is, we spend time together, he shares plans with me(not all though) and he has different girls  who want him ( A̶̲̥̅♏‎​ sure), calling @all time ((butIidentt act concerned).

He broke up with his fiancee last year cos they both found out they are (or were?) 4th cousins, just some months to their wedding. And he(according to him) has not been into anything committed after her. He also said it takes him time to open up.

The question is; I don’t want to rush nor push him. I like our friendship and want to maintain it. And cos i naturally care for people(let alone people i really like),I want to be free with him, cook, clean, eat n wash together(as b4), ♓☺w do i still be friends, not be pushy even as we still hang out together and also not push him away(cos i badly like him), until we start dating properly?

And is there anything i can do to make me irresistible and make him genuinely?  Or maybe A̶̲̥̅♏‎​ reading wrong meanings? Or A̶̲̥̅♏‎​ i too uptight( cos him agreeing to be committed and me “giving in”, does not guarantee genuine relationship).

He makes me feel so good!

But abeg, i‘d rather walk away while i still can now and feel sad for some days than remain in a sweet illusion.

Help me please!!!



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18 thoughts on “Please Help A Confused Lady”

  1. i had to read this post two times before i could understand. WOrds not clearly spelt out. looks so confusing and incoherent. If you want him, den let him know or give him signs that you do if you dont want to tell him directly. play your cards well and he is yours. washing his clothes and doing all his chores wont make him love you. You want to become irristible, create an atmosphere of irristibilty. Dont be around him always and when you eventually do be intruiging. Men love to unravel a package. If you tell him what is in the package, den it becomes uninteresting for him

    Reply
  2. Be careful, and still maintain ur stand on the sex issue. But enjoy while it it last, who knows…..

    Reply
  3. Well said Vivien…. @poster, e get 1 baba for amukoko. If him give you powder wallai… The guy go propose.

    My candid opinion, he doesn't love you, neither does he need you, all he wants is to get to Canaan Land (the promise land).

    Draw ur ear!

    Nuff'Warning… Run or be gunned

    Reply
  4. A man that wants you and that will stay, will stay. A guy that will go, will go (Even if you cook diamond sauce, tequila sauce etc and do monkey style in bed). Don't stress yourself too much. If it's meant to be, it'll be. Having him commit and you giving it all up, guarantees nothing! Some guys would pretend to be serious just to get the cookie and dump your a** once they've gotten it (after the stress!). Do not be scared that you're being pushy. You aren't. A guy that wants you will stay, pushy or not. At least, the 'rape poster's husband didn't dump/divorce her after the 3years, 27 weeks abi? The only rule is to play smart in your own game. Cos trust me, guys know all these 90-day rule games and some would play along only to dump you after the 90 days. I know of someone that proposed just so as to get the cookie and dumped the girl afterwards. Be smart!

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  5. All he wants is your waist, poster hold ur two ears and listen carefully! A who was about to get married last year but couldn't cos she was his blood! Obviously he loved that lady enough to Have proposed! Sorry to say this but seems he playing the rebound game! A man who puts sex before anything is not to be trusted except you want to be friends with benefits!who knows they might be a bet! Your cards are laid on the table! Let the poker game begin!

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  6. Madam poster, u know d answer to ur confusion which is comot eye from d matter, free d serious relationship ish with him..

    Reply
  7. My dear, just be his friend and forget about dating him. It seems u like him a lot. I had d same issue wiv a close family friend. Who fell madly inlove wiv me @ some point, I would tell him my escapades freely he would tell me his, buh my dear I loved him too much to want to sleep wiv him.cuz in d end if we broke up it would kill our friendship.and I valued our friendship too much. I'm married now and we r still very good friends. Though we now stay in diff states….follow ur head Oo°˚˚˚°! . Good luck

    Reply

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