The Issue Is Boredom, I Barely Have Friends

Hello Aunty Eya.
 How do you do? I have a slight issue here. I don't know if you can help me out. I am Julian, 23 years old, from Kogi state, I reside in abuja with my family, I graduated
last year from the university and currently serving in Lagos.

 The issue is, boredom. I barely have friends in Lagos. 7 days in a week, I always go to bed bored and lonely. We hardly have light, and I don't have a generator. Once my battery goes off, that's the end for the day. I stay at home, stare at the ceiling till I fall asleep.

 I'm really fed up of this kind of living. I'd like to have a friend. Someone who can always make me smile, someone who I could be able to hang out with probably during weekends, someone who can send me a text during work hours to let me know I'm being thought of, (lol) someone who could just be there for me! Anyone caring and gentle (cuz I detest razz people) could reach me on 28A24775 or 080********. Thanks.
Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless handheld from Glo Mobile.


EYA: Hi Julie, You are an adult, I hope you know that putting your number online like I put mine means that anyone can reach you?
Are you sure you are ready for that? or, is there a particular kind of people you are looking for as friends or just anybody in Lagos?

Is it fellow corpers in Lagos you want to hang out with? People from your state who live in Lagos or...?

Are there no  corpers sharing your lodge with you?
Please help me with answers to these questions OK?
Much Love,
Eya

JULIE: Thanks for these questions. I appreciate that. I understand your point about the phone number. Let me use my BBM PIN and email then and leave the number.

I am not looking for fellow corpers. I don't want that because I intend to settle and work in lagos after service. It's working class people that will be able to help me more based on their experience and sorts.

I am not looking for a particular person either from my state or not. I just want someone from whatever state who lives in Lagos and who will be a friend.
There are no corpers sharing my lodge except one but always not around.
Any more questions, I'll be glad to answer. Thanks.

Can you guys please advise Julie?

Comments

  1. Anonymous5/11/2013

    U can ve many friends and still be lonely...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jazmyn5/11/2013

      How do you mean?

      Delete
  2. Anonymous5/11/2013

    Dear JULIAN, I think U should be more Socialable. Don't just sit one place waiting for a GOOD friend to show up, go out n make some frnds. U can choose the friends you like from places you go, where you work, where you live, jst any where. During weekends, I advice you to clean yourself up, look good n take yourself out. You may look for a decent restaurant to relax a little perhaps take some time n buy a drink, sip it slowly while maintaining your poise n aplomb, I assure you, you 'll be the one rejecting excess frnds if you make yourself more friendly while in the midst of people. You can also visit places, single someone out n engage d person in conversation, you can offer to buy d drinks. With time, U 'll make many MUTUAL friends. I for one, I 've very FEW frndz as well, bt thats because I'm quite reserved n more of an indoor person when I'm nt on the go. What you jst did by exposing ur pin n number is very risky, be security conscious. CYNTHIA'S case is still a pointer to how dangerous blind dates could be. Be gentle as a dove n wise as a Serpent in all you do.

    BEST REGARDS.
    VALENTINE.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Let me clear. Is it a boyfriend you need? I am assuming you are a girl cos I am not sure. Boredom is a thing of the mind. Like someone said above, you can be surrounded by a crowd and still feel bored and lonely. So start from ur mind. Learn to make yourself happy by yourself. Improve ur self-image and be ur own best friend.

    I also think you shud go out more often and meet people. I can only advise you about church. Join a service department in church and a fellowship or cell meeting.

    Reach out to people. You might feel bad that no one called you, but others are feeling bad that you dnt call. One of my best friends now, we were barely friends in school. After school, from 'how far, how far?"...we became good friends.

    Learn a hand work. Or something new. Trust me, ur one year in NYSC will just finish now now! Lol. Use this time to learn so many things. I personally dnt subscribe to having too many friends at this period cos one can get implicated that way. So many people are just moving around without focus. Use this time to 'arrange' ur life...prayerfully too. Just surround ur self with a few sense-making people and you'll be fine.

    Read more. You know all those motivational Joyce Meyer kind of books? Buy at least one a month. Read it at night, pray and sleep. Trust me, if you do this consistently, after your NYSC, people will know that there is a difference in you and you'll have more friends than you can handle...especially mature friends.

    My opinion sha....

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous5/11/2013

    Good one Ahdaisy

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm sure your pass out date is on the 6th of June and the thought of returning to kogi hunts you! That you should have said than ridicule a Cosmopolitan city like Lagos.

    Lagos can never be boring, even the 2 ends of Lagos badagry & Epe are not as boring as kogI, cos i've been to lokoja & ayangba. As populated as Lagos it's shocking that you found it hard to make friends.

    Anyway!
    Good luck in your quest.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous5/11/2013

    Bored in Lagos, wow. There is a lot of avenues to make friends other than putiing your BB pin for everyone out here. NYSC is the best time to network. why not start from the church where you attend. There are lots of free seminar also organised that will you can attend, network and upgrade yourself or if you are finacially buoyant you can sign up and learn a skill. Having put your BB pin here you need to be security cautious. There are lots of people who might want to take advantage of you cos you seem desperate.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous5/11/2013

    Bored in Lagos, wow. There is a lot of avenues to make friends other than putiing your BB pin for everyone out here. NYSC is the best time to network. why not start from the church where you attend. There are lots of free seminar also organised that will you can attend, network and upgrade yourself or if you are finacially buoyant you can sign up and learn a skill. Having put your BB pin here you need to be security cautious. There are lots of people who might want to take advantage of you cos you seem desperate.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Fyn Ijebu Chic5/11/2013

    U think Lagos is boring. Pls let us swap. I was born, bred and buttered in lag. Had to run away for my university cos my pple wanted lag.
    If lagos is boring, then Ekiti is wat? Boringest. Pls dnt make me cry.
    Friendship is nt abt location, it is a tin of d heart. My friends are nt in ekiti wit me bt believe me, they r contribute d largest quota in making my service year memorable!
    Dat said, I will be ur friend if u dnt mind!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous5/11/2013

    Babe,ds ur post worry o! You can't even make friends where you work? Try work place na! Putting ur contact out like ds is not too good u know. Town no dey smile ds days o.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous5/12/2013

    Am suspectiNg u!u be runs gal ba?u dey find toasters ni? Be careful o!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hmmmmmnnn, how about d 3 weeks u spent in camp? So u didn't make any friend? What of CDS days? U still didn't make any friend? Then former secondary school n university mates that reside in lagos? Church? And u didn't specify if its male or female frnds u want! Hmmmmmmnnnn so many thoughts running thru my head but lemme just give a lil advice before heading back to bed, what is it about u dat drives possible frnds away? Do u hv a unfriendlt face, do u smile a lot? Are u snubbish? Etc u can go to d chc, cinema, beach, seminars etc am sure u will meet friends. But pls n pls be very careful u already sound desperate, be wise in finally selecting ppl dat will b ur frnds. Most of my close besties r my secondary sch pals, duh we all live worlds apart, d bond is still tight, trust me hv met other nice ppl in uni, chc, camp but most of dem later showed me dia true nature. Don't b to quick to trust n share secrets, let time n wisdom guide u! Every tree will bear its fruits in due season, so allow time to reveal dia tendency before u take d frndship to d next level.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous5/12/2013

    Ur BB Pin online?!! Woww!!!, wit all d happenings in the cyber world? ( e.g cynthia saga) my dear, I bliv by nw u must be having numerous friend requests on ur BB. So ur case is settled; make ur choice or keep them all, the ball is in ur court NØW !!!
    #luvlycat says so#

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous5/12/2013

    I'm going thru same o
    I have no friends. The problem I have is not in meeting people but maintaining a healthy relationship with people o
    I stay in LAGOS
    I've not attended a social gathering/function for the past 2years only church o
    I'm 24 and a graduate still looking for a job
    I've not been in a relationship for the past 2 years.
    My social life is ZERO!
    And to top every I'm melancholic
    I'm getting tired with my boring life I swear

    Nella

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous5/12/2013

      Eeyah! Pele dearie
      Nt even a friend?
      I feel ur pain.
      Had same issues wen I switched location bt my friends were great!
      Always caLl me up and paid t.fare for visitations.

      Delete

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