Can A Man Love Two Women At The Same Time?


Please I have a question, can a guy love two women at the same time? I think my boyfriend has another girlfriend and he is trying to
decide who he will marry. Help!!!! I don't know what to do or how to react.
Ps: we are in a long distant relationship. 

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Comments

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    1. Like really?who made men polygamous by nature?the traditions of men is being made to sound like the gospel which is very sad!
      Did God create two wives for Adam?did he say a man would leave his parents and marry 2,3,4 women and they would become one flesh?
      If men are polygamous by nature why is adultery a sin?
      Have u heard what the apostle Paul said should be the criteria for the selection of an overseer @ 1Tim 3:2,12 &1Cor 7,2?
      Madam Titi if u would allow your man to unzip his trousers @ every given opportunity and delude yourself wit the philosophy that all men are polygamous then fine!but please don't spread this ungodly view assuming u are a christian and has the fruitage of the spirit!
      There are men who are averse to cheating,please don't generalize!

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    2. Thank you somuch Abena,of recent this fallacy of generalization has been goingon. My dad never cheated on my mum,and I've never cheated in any of my relationships. Quite dis-heartening how they singleout the men to blame each time.

      ~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA3310

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    3. Thanks Abena and Bona.. Anytime I see that statement, I just get weak. Men 'seem' to be that way cos we women accept it. We coach our sons to be that way, and we teach our daughters to accept it. Directly or indirectly!

      It is a wrong mindset and shud be sent back to where it came from. God specifically made Eve from Adam so that we will know that it is not ok to have more than one life partner. He did not make Eve from something else somewhere...He did not make many women and ask Adam to choose one. He made ONE! So which nature are we talking about? I know so many men who do not cheat so it is not even a majority issue...

      Funny enough the men we are trying to defend know that it is not their nature. Ask real men and they will tell you it's not.

      Personally, I can even say that POSSESSIVENESS is more likely to be their nature. Men do not like to share their woman with another man, in any way... That can easily be explained considering it's their rib involved... :-)

      So my fellow women, pls let's stop consoling our selves with that kian talk abeg.

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    4. After having read all reply to my first comment which i stand by , i thought i should add that men have the will and always will to do the right thing, which is loving a partner and sticking to her.
      For example human beings are by nature liars but that does not mean all human beings tell lies.
      The decision to stand by a partner applies both to men and women, as is the decision to do and live right.
      The decision to do the right things is with individuals.

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    5. Anonymous4/19/2017

      Thanx guys Bt I thnk I cn share my story too cos m confused,men sumtymz they dnt knw wht they want.i accidentally found him wth a gal,he chose her over me now he is apologising I am confused nd nt knowing what to do cos i am stil inlove wth him and again i feel like leaving.

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  2. Anonymous5/22/2013

    Should I confront him? or pretend i didn't see anything. Should I give him an ultimatum? I don't want to come across as a nag . This issue is really weighing me down.
    Poster.

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    1. U this poster u ve got deep seated issues!seriously u do and have no idea!
      U believe a man who's sleeping wit u and hoping to a have a future with is cheating on u and u don't wanna come across as a what?u want him to give u a disease first before u confront him or u waiting for him to ditch you first and u end up in the mental institution?
      How old are u again?
      U have got communication issues,pls deal wit that first.
      And no neither a man or woman can love two people @ the same time,it a deluded thinking.what happens is that both the two pple compensate for what one lacks,for example girl A might be a great sex mate but might lack basic cooking skills while girl A would b a michellin 5star chef but would be a bore in bed,that's how it rows.
      If u have got hard evidence to confront him,go ahead howver I wld say such a man aint worth it,boot his ass out!if he can cheat in a relationship,trust me he's gonna do worse if u marry him then u gonna come to Eya's blog and cry while u could have prevented it.Proverbs 22:3 says "shrewd is the one that has seen calamity and procEeds to conceal himself but the inexperienced have passed along and must suffer the penalty!"Let the reader use discernment.
      I'm done!

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    2. I already typed an epistle to paste here till I saw your comment.
      God bless you Abbena. I wonder where some girls keep their brain when they claim to be in love.

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  3. Anonymous5/22/2013

    A real man cannoy truly love 2 women at d same time.
    What is love?
    Read ur bible to know d true meaning of love.
    A man once told me " a man's greatest weapon is a woman's ability to lie to herself".
    U can deceive urself and say he loves me more.
    Thats why u can find a mam with 4 gfs. 1 main nd 3 attachments. The attachees usually know and hpe 2 b promoted one day.
    If u confront him and he fesses up what wld u do?
    If u dont break up with him or at least give d r/ship a brk for a while, trust me he wld do it again or even worse in marriage.
    He wld just think u can take wateva shit he dishes out.
    Know ur worth and know wat u deserve and ask urself if u deserve to be a 2nd fiddle.
    And always trust ur instinct, ur female intuition it can never lie to u.

    Karen

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  4. Dear poster, No, it is not possible to love two women at the same time. Actually, I dare say he doesn't love either of you. He is just looking for the best fit.

    Love is not a question, it is a KNOWING. Love is not confused and it doesn't gamble. Love sees what it wants and will not go away till it get what it wants. And after getting what it wants, love fights many battles to remain with want it wants forever.

    If you are sure about your information, then confront him. Don't wait for a man to play games with your heart. Your confronting him should not change anything, and if it does and he chooses the other, then good riddance. It means it's the other person he really loves. By confrontation, I dnt mean yelling, or nagging. I mean, sit him down and discuss.

    Men are not polygamous by nature. They seem to be that way cos tradition favours them. Imagine if it was normal for a woman to have more than one husband, imagine if it were a woman's world....hmm....some women will pile men up on top of each other and date them all. In fact their husband will be so many, they will have to 'lap' each other in other to have family meeting...lool.

    I mean even as it is not in our favour many ladies date more than one man at a time, then imagine if it was normal?

    Pls talk to your man. Dnt be the lady who sat and watched while the other walked down the aisle...

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  5. This reminds me of a stormy relationship I had before I got married.
    I'd actually suspected for a while but he kept lying and saying they were just friends. So when I got to the point where the 'friend' would call me to insult me or pick his calls when I called, etc I decided that I couldn't let him play me that way anymore. Left him and cut off all ties with him. I stayed out of any relationship for a while. It hurt like crazy cause I had been with him for a while but it turned out to be the best decision I ever made. I met my husband later on and the rest is history.

    Please don't ever sell yourself short. Some women have this 'he should pick me over her' mentality which just gives those sort of men the power to manipulate you over and over again. A man who will play 2 or more ladies before he gets married will do worse once he gets married.

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  6. Anonymous5/22/2013

    Thank you Titilayo. Let us continue to live in denial naa. Men can love more than one woman.

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  7. Anonymous5/22/2013

    Wait, did u just ask whether you should have a heart-heart talk with him? Rotflmao... Babes, dude is cheating on you, you are kinda aware and you are still with him, as what? The things women take from men... My dear, they are so not worth it abeg.

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  8. Hmm. I had to consult google and the bible for the definition of love.

    Google: Love is a deep feeling of affection.
    Bible:   Love is patient, kind, not jealous or conceited or proud, not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; does not keep a record of wrongs; is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up; and its faith, hope, and patience never fail. Love is eternal.

    So, with all of these, I guess the question is can one man have all of these for two women at the same time?
    In my opinion, I do not think the answer to that question is really the 'koko' now.

    I don't think the question you should be asking right now is whether he loves you both. It's almost impossible for someone to love two people the exact same way. Whoever he chooses to marry has more to do with what he wants in a wife and not on whether he loves you both.

    But first of all, why do you think he has someone else? How does he treat you? Does he show you that he truly loves you? Is he the type of man you want to marry? Do you love him too? Before you give yourself headache, answer these questions.

    You really need to go get some dose of SELF ESTEEM sha. You deserve a love that is ETERNAL.
    Bible love together with google love. Cos I know that if it was bible love he had for you, he will have absolutely NO reason to have someone else.

    Confront him, don't go and give yourself headache. You deserve the best. It's not a competition with anybody.

    What you need to do is to ask him about this other lady (if there is one). If there is one, make a wise decision with plenty of self esteem in check. Don't beg him for anything.

    You are not a coin that someone should be tossing up and down and doing "who will I marry, Head or Tail"?

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  9. Anonymous5/22/2013

    He isn't in town so its not easy to have a heart to heart.
    Poster

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    1. Anonymous5/23/2013

      You think? How do you know? Some times we see some thing and we start assuming. You must be sure and then confront him.

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  10. Anonymous5/22/2013

    Eya this your blog is turning to africamagic, I dnt know if you just forge the stories in the comfort of your bed. I will advise that you start writing scripts for nollywood.

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    1. Jazmyn5/23/2013

      Are you a blind bat? can't you see it's a comment she copied and pasted here. Na by force?

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  11. Anonymous5/22/2013

    Lol..all these things happen joor. Aunty eya nice one. Your blog is really helping a lot of ppl.

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  12. My dear long distance relationship can be very challenging, and one of the major issues is TRUST! From your msg, you seem not too sure of the info. You need to have a talk with him, ask questions politely and let him know your mind. But IF he says for sure there is another girl, pls,pls and pls take a walk! It doesnt matter whether u knew him first before the other girl or not! Its not pride, its called self respect becos a guy who truely loves you will never make you as one of his available options. www.tesedi.blogspot.com.

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  14. Anonymous5/22/2013

    NEWS FLASH dear poster!he doesn't love any 1 of u!dats my op o.wen a man loves a woman,he won't nid2b trying2figure out whic1 2spend d rest of his life with,he'll jus b very sre dis is d1,bt den again ders a saying dat if u fall in luv with 2pple,choose d 2nd person bcos if u truly loved d 1st u won't av fallen in luv again.I don't think dis ur boda is crazily in luv with u,he might jus like d idea of u bin his wife!a lot of men marry like dis,dey jus feel u'll b ideal!dis long distance things kwa,dunno how u want2resolve dis 1 now.think its best u tell him wat u know n give him an ultimatum,dats how u can tell if he really luvs u!

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    1. Your comment is a typical example of what's called "juxtaposition".

      No space between punctuation mark and the next word; too much shorthands and no paragraphs. Men, this is an eyesore. Sorry!

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  15. Anonymous1/08/2014

    As a man who is faithful and never went for another woman in a 7 year relationship I say yes. I have lots of girls who flirt with me daily etc but that is generally just light hearted. I am deeply in love with my GF however I also have very strong feelings for another woman. I would love to be able to care for both of them. Realistically though women are not designed to share men like this and require full commitment. Of course my GF would be devastated if I ever was with another women emotionally or physically, therefore I would never act on this desire because I am not simply an animal and strive to be better than my instincts. If society was geared that way I think some men could actually love and provide for two women equally, its just not the way things are though

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  16. Anonymous4/07/2014

    Define "deeply in love" and "very strong feelings" pls. Surely they must be different as you used different words...

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  17. Anonymous7/01/2014

    Definitely possible to love 2 women. Women just don't like the idea that it is because it's something that they can't control. No matter how good you are no matter how much time is invested, it can happen. The thing is though, the man has to get close enough to this other woman to get to know her on that level. That's where the wrong in the situation comes out. The act of loving is uncontrollable. But putting yourself in the position to love another is.

    Trust me I'm an astronaut!

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