Please Teach Me How To Show Signs, How To Give Subtle Hints

Good morning Aunty Eya, what I'm going to tell you may look bad and stupid but please hear me out and help in whatever way you can. I need prayers and advise too.
There is a family that's like family friends with my family. My
late Dad and their Father who is still living used to be the best of friends. After my Dad passed, their father took over the Education of two of my younger siblings. He cared so much for us without expecting anything in return. When my devilish uncles stole everything from us, he was there.

This family has three men, two are already settled in their jobs while they last boy is still an undergraduate. Sometimes, the way their parents send them on errands to us makes me wonder if he is not looking for ways to hook us up. 

I have a big crush on the second boy who is in his twenties I guess, I am also in my early twenies. When I am around him, it feels like I have met my husband, I like everything about him, he is so charming and good looking, he is also the most intelligent of the three.

He doesn't seem to know that I want him, we relate well like family friends and it ends there. Meanwhile, the elder brother is the one making moves, trying to get to know me more and making me feel like he is interested in me. He is my least favorite among the three. I don't want him and I don't want his younger brother to ever suspect that his elder is interested in me. I want him far from me. I want his younger, the one who makes me blush non stop.

How to give him subtle hints that I like him is a big problem, I have no clue. I am a very shy girl who can never make advances on a guy, NEVER. I want to show him signs that I am dying to have him but do not know how to go about it. I don't want to make a fool of myself, neither do I want his elder brother to unconsciously block my chances.

Aunty Eya, I know you are a responsible married mother. But, I still have a feeling that you or other ladies  can give me a few clues or guide.
Please, how do I make him understand my feelings without being too forward or embarrassing myself? I need help ASAP, before it gets late. Please!


  1. But I guess getting him to love u is much better,my dear getting just his attention or trying to let him know u feel something for him isn't enough.
    U deserve more than that, and don't look desperate,if he loves u,he'll definitely make the move just like everyother man would do. you're already close enough to be noticed.

    ~BONARIO~says so via NOKIA3310

    1. Anonymous4/10/2013

      Bonario, you are very intelligent. More intelligent than I thought.

    2. Anonymous4/10/2013

      Keep it up, your comments are always on point, and at Linda's blog, I always laugh. You might be a world known counsellor one day, that's if u re interested.


    3. Anonymous4/10/2013

      He seems very humble also. Keep it up, Bonario.

    4. Anonymous4/10/2013

      Bona bona,d man in d house don talk.

  2. Keep building yourself to have good self esteem and confidence. Some men like shy girls, others may prefer those who know what they want.

    Improve yourself, have some interests you can engage him in conversation with, your hobbies, news, gist, etc.

    Don't be shy talking about your achievements in school or at work, you say he's intelligent, that may attract him to you.

    Learn the art of flirting, catch his eyes briefly, smile at him, laugh at his jokes, touch him lightly, his hair, shoulder, and chat with him.

    Don't do what you're not comfortable doing, and bear in mind that whatever you do, if he's not into you, you can't force him.

    All the best!

    1. Anonymous4/10/2013

      These tips are for shy ladies like me. Thank you Romance.

  3. Anonymous4/10/2013

    Oh chimooo!!!

  4. @ Anonymous, O kwa ya oooo! Lolz@o chimooo...

    Sometimes when a lady has a crush on someone, she tries to behave the opposite to him so as not betray her real emotion. I hope that's not what you are doing?

    Anyway, I always go back to what the bible says about he who FINDS A WIFE, not the other way round. Be the best of you character and looks wise. If he still doesn't find you, let him be. Many people who 'signal' guys into liking them, end up getting hurt by those guys. If all these years he did not see you that way, dnt force it.

    Also keep ur options open by 1. Tell his brother you are not interested. Give him an 'obvious' sign that you are not. Let him not spoil show for you.
    2. There might be a guy out there who really wants you but you might too blinded with this guy to see it.

    To an extent, I believe what you have is a crush...cos your description of him sounded so 'crushy'. Be sure in your heart that you will not wake up one day and ask 'who the hell are you and what am I doing with you?'. My sis, e dey happen o....

    But if you dnt want to hear all I have written above, then this is for you.
    With guys, there is nothing like subtle hint. Many problems between couple stems from the fact that, the guy just doesn't get what she is hinting at. You have to tell him HOHA what yo want. If you flirt with him, he might see it as just flirting, if you dnt flirt, he will sister-zone you. If you flirt too much, he will see it as you are obsessed with him or even crazy.

    Then pray that if he is right man for you, God will remove the scales in his eyes. :-)

  5. Anonymous4/10/2013

    No gbegiri on this blog ooo, will some kind heart teach me plssss?

  6. Hi Aunty Eya,I want to say a big thank you for the good things i've learnt from your blog,God bless you..can you pls give me some hints on how to keep a man,lately av sensed a different level of love from my BF,and am enjoying it and don't want it to stop,please how do I get it to remain this could help me post it too.thank you..

  7. Anonymous4/10/2013

    @ anonymous 7:56......u tuk d words out of my mouth. The comment about Bonario.u wunt bliv I put on My pm ysterday dat Bonario is everywhere. Yeah he ll prolly make a sound and funny counsellor one of ds days. My advice to Kaka however is dt she should not flirt wiv d guy she liks @ all.dt might even send the wrong message that you are always readily available and dats a big turn-off 4 a guy. As for d guys broda.......fleeeeeeeee from him,don't let him come near u,b4 he spoils ur runz....loll! All d best!

  8. ****Mufasa Said4/10/2013

    I would av said you should read 48 Laws of power and Laws of Attraction but let me tell u a story.

    I had a massive bombastic crush on this guy, 2 d extent that I started seeing him in my dreams! All I was living for then was just 2 av him in my life. Since he dint notice all I was throwing @ him, I decided to play CatWoman! I started chatting wt him under a difrnt name and to my amazement, he was perfect on d inside out! (I can bet that ur crush was not as huge as mine then) when it came to time to reveal myself and I eventually did, he was shocked and somewhat disappointed @ wat I did and said "May this not this time and this stage, I have actually like and honestly admired u but wt wat u av done, I tink u av spoilt every chance we had @ being friends"
    Moral of the story, let him notice u for who u are and not what u want him to see. Coz if u force it, he just might get tired of u easily

    ****Mufasa Said

  9. Hmm Eya, the kain scenarios way una dey get for here be like Nollywood movie. Anyhow, I will donate my two cents.... are you sure the guy you like is not taken?

    Secondly, talk to the elder brother, start a conversation with him and find a way to drop the fact that you like some guy but don't know how to tell him and then tell him that since he, the older brother, is like a brother to you he should please suggest something for you.

    I call that killing two birds with one stone

  10. Anonymous4/14/2013

    Hello every1, lemme just add my two cents. I want u to look @ d bigger picture because sometimes who we want is not who God wants for us. I think ur 'crush' on dis guy might be blocking you from seeing d good side of his elder brother who might be right for you. He seems more mature and responsible and ready to settle down which is more than I can say for ur crush. However if it were me, cos I'm pretty blunt and straightforward sometimes, I would ask subtle plus joke filled questions like, "na wa ooo u don't want to get a girl friend, why are you delaying now". Just conversations that will draw out the answers you need


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