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Showing posts with label marriage tips. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage tips. Show all posts

What Can I Do About Hubby's Stinginess And That Lady?


pls I have a challenge below. publish on ur blog. pls hide my identity, thnks.
I have been married for a year now.
tried talking about my trust for him. i told him outrightly that he does/shows things that makes me doubt him and then i told him to EARN my trust for him. How do I trust him again? 
1. I dont trust my husband at all. 2. A particular lady friend of his
has been an issue btw d both of us in the past. I stumbled on messages from her to him/him to her. I asked and he said there's nothing, just raising hopes and flirting. i ignored all that. Last week, I used his phone to send a message and I stumbled into a msg from that same girl sending her account number. One of the things that attracted my husband to me is that I never disturbed him regularly for money. I was independent. 

I never saw it as a big deal but I felt at the same time that every man should be sensitive to his woman's needs. As we got married, I still never bothered him all d time for money but d few times I ask, I was being dribbled, stories up and down.

I sometimes get jobs for him and encourage him and not even at least "thank you/dash you money" from him..lolz..if u women know what i mean. I eventually told him that he shld be try and be sensitive to my needs. 

I don't have to chase

My Husband Is Lying To Me At This Early Stage Of Our Marriage


Hello Eya,

I'm a married woman and have been married for about 9months now. There's this particular girl that came to me all in the name of friendship so that my hubby could assist her get roles in a movie.


 I have been assisting her get roles in movies produced by my husband after much pleading with him. All of a sudden she started misbehaving and the last one she did was gossip, I'm not a fan of female friends cos I hate their wahala, so, to put a stop to it, I told my husband I don't wanna see her in his jobs again and I don't want someone that will break my home. 


To avoid problems, he deleted her frm his bbm. Since then I have been asking if she called him to

Should I Insist On Getting A Househelp?

Hi Aunty Eya and my lovely WC readers,pls I want to know you peoples opinion on this matter,I'm a mother of two expecting the third,my hubby says no house help, but one of his brothers lives with us, he's in his early 20's and he does help out but there are some chores I don't like him to do for me, like bathing my girls.

I really need a house help(female),  but, he says he doesn't want peoples wahala, that any time our kids are on holiday we will travell to his people, who honestly I can say do take good care of us too. and honestly I love going to his people cos they love me and my kids very much as if I'm their child.

my

Condoms In My Wife's Handbag, Should I Believe Her Story?

Good evening WC. I'm just trying to bring out my wife's ringing phone from her bag and here is a pack of condoms before my eyes.she says they are for when she is not safe but I'd be a fool to believe that crap.I know things are a bit hard of late but I still try my best to provide for her and our daughter. I work

My Husband Loves It But I Don't, What Can I Do?

Goodday Eya am a regular reader of this blog . Pls hide my identity . I have been married for fifteen yrs . My husband could no longer  freely make love for some yrs due to health issue . Am ready to live  and take it as one of the challanges of marriage and be faithful. 

As a child of God i cannot even think otherwise cos i fear and love God. Of recent he is asking for oral sex , i tried it for the first time with

My Husband In A Rampage Mode, I'm So Confused, What Can I Do Now?

I have been married since 1981. I always refused my husband sex, last year he became tired of waiting, he had found out about some affairs, and he decided he supported me for 31 years , He was owed, its not that I did not want sex. I love sex. Its just as the last year has proved. He does not feel he owes anyone any thing in his life. He was forced to be the better man by me refusing keeping him in line. But the last 14 years he has hurt nine men very badly because he refuses to give up any more rights. 

5 in the last year, two on Saturday. He has become controlling, if its in his house it is his business, I was always taught if you are told even in your own house you are not invited or its none of your business you stepped out for a few hours. Saturday His father invited me to breakfast to talk about what has been happening with my husband. 

Two of his fathers friend forced him away with two unloaded weapons and I went with them. My husband tracked us down where we were eating and he did not show any mercy when he waded into us with his cane. I am living with my father and mother in law right now, The police said we needed to let my husband cool off but there was not an arrest made because two fire arms were uses as a threat, It did not matter they had no bullets. My mother in law says I am to

Husbands, Stop Doing These Things, Post By Eesah

Ok guys, we've talked about what women should stop doing to their husbands.... and even more
 Now to balance it since lots of husbands visit this blog as well.. What are those things husbands need to stop doing that hurt their darling wives....Wives this would interest u too..
Sometimes men need encouragement in their quest to step up and be the men God has called them to be. Sometimes they need information, and sometimes they need training. Sometimes they need a mentor, someone who will show them how to be godly men, how to love their wives.
Here are ONLY 40 ideas. Of course, not all of these items apply to all men. But perhaps something here will hit home for you.

1. Stop acting like the battle is won in pursuing and getting to know your wife. Have fun together, just like you used to do before you walked down the aisle.
2. If your wife is a stay-at-home mom, stop treating her like her work during the day is somehow less strenuous or less important than yours.
3. Stop coming home from work and plopping in front of the television for the night, leaving your wife to bear the responsibility for everything else going on in the home.
4. Stop working so much. Find a healthy balance between work and family. Your wife would rather have you than a big house, nice car, etc.
5. Stop acting like you’re listening when you’re really watching TV.
6. Stop allowing the spiritual leadership of the family to default to your wife.
7. Stop being passive when

Enduring A Sexless Marriage

Kindly help this poster anyway you can, with tips or advice. This mail has been in my inbox for over a month now. When I first saw it, I advised her to leave it as a comment. She didn't get any advice and I'm posting here cos I promised that if no one replies, I'll make it a blog post. Her mail below:

I'm a silent reader of wives connection blog
> > Its indeed a blessing cos av really learnt much through the various
> > comments. Kudos to them too.
> > Av been married for over 7yrs now and my marriage has been wonderful. The
> > problem  is  that my hubby has placed me on sex diet (so

How Vaginismus Made Me Scared Of Our Wedding Night

This is a comment from the link-me-up post. Well, after the poster asked to be linked up with Chidi, I contacted her. Chidi suggested that the poster  leaves her supposed help on the blog  as a comment so that other readers scared of their wedding night; have been labeled as having spiritual husbands can benefit too. The poster left this there and I just had to make it a separate blog post...


  1. POSTER'S COMMENT BELOW:
  2. My story is kinda long. But I'll try tocut it short. I got married sometime in 2011 as a virgin. Dated my hubby a year and half before our wedding. We agreed no sex before marriage. Buh after our wedding, i was unable to have sex wit him. No matter how hard we tried, it felt like it ws impossible to me. 

  3. Our parents intervened, our mums will call me and talk and talk and talk yet nothing. Until one day hubby felt enough was enough. He askd me to leave his house. that was like after 10 months of our wedding. I was frustrated, I wanted to run to any where aside home. I felt I was a failure. But luckily for me, mum called me just while I was contemplating which city or even village to head to (need I add that she didnt know I was sent out and plan'n to run away. Well may be mother's instinct). I had to open up to her and she pleaded with me to come home.

    When I got home, my parents decided it could b spiritual, they took me from one church to another and of coourse they were busy seeing whatever visions. One even said I was possessed and married to a spirit husband and bla bla bla. Meanwhile, my hubby's family had started mounting pressure on him to come home and start the divorce process. Stories had started going round and one of his cousins heard it. She called him up and told him she had a former colleague that had the same issue sometime ago and it was medically treated.

  4. Hubby called to tell me about what he discussed with his cousin. They said the condition is known as

Having An Affair With A Married Woman

Hello aunty eya i have a pressing issue and would love to hear WC reader's opinion please hide my identity.

Am 4 years in marriage with two lovely kids lately my hubby became over-protective of his phone which he didn't use to before now so out of curiosity when he fell asleep at night i discovered (through his bbm chat)he is in a sexual relationship with a married woman to the extent that

My Husband Fast Asleep In Same Bed With Male Friend

Hello Aunty Eya and WC, I am a new reader of your blog,and l find it very entertaining and educating. I was moved to tell a story of a friend who is very dear to my heart,so that your readers can give advice on this story am about to share. It's a long story but l'll try to make it as brief as l can.

         A very close friend of mine who is in her early 20s fell in love with a man 10years older than she was and that year in 2012 they got married. But had not been able to conceive. In 2013,her husband lost his job and things became financially unstable for the couple. But later that year,she decided to travel out of the country to stay with her mother for a while at least to clear her mind off the stress. Early 2014. 

She came back to the country and noticed that everything had changed for her husband. He now had a job in a big company,he was living in a company house,he had a brand new BMW X6,and lots of money to spend. She asked him how it all happened and he just simply said that an old friend of his gave him the job and helped him bounce back. She then insisted they go over to his house to thank him and also meet with him. So on a chosen day they visited the friend's  home,he was still single and lived alone. They went out to have dinner.

 The friend later suggested they

No More Love For My Husband,What Do I Do?

Hello,

Please I feel compelled to share and get advice.

I have been married for 3 years plus and I am at a point where I resent my husband and his presence irritates me.

This is an aftermath of abandonment when I was pregnant 4 months into the marriage and his repeated infidelity to the point he got someone pregnant.

I can not just bring myself to trust him and I always see an ulterior motive in all his actions.

At this point in my marriage I feel like throwing in the towel because I don't love him and care less what he is up to.

I am most happiest when

My Husband With A Call Girl, I Need Help

Good afternoon A-Eya, wc peope I hail o.I have been a reader of this blog but have never wrote to A-Eya before. Wells I got married early 2013. My husband is ten years older than me and I don't really understands him any longer he comes home very late, sometimes around 11pm past 12 etc and I was pregnant all this time and have been receiving threat messages from his female lover telling me I will loss my baby that am not the only one pregnant for my own husband and I showed my so called husband the messages but he said he does not know who is sending the messages to me and that I should never in my life show him the messages again,and I was already heavily pregnant so I have to go and see one of his friend told him he knew my husband was cheating and he never advised my husband so l left the guys place so I guess the friend called him on the phone and told him I came so my husband started calling me but I did not pick cos have already packed some

Can Low Sperm Motility Be Corrected? Visit Doctor Before Fertility Prayer Please

My lovely WC family. Its been awhile! Trust you are all doing well? Ok , can you recall a woman who wrote to ask about HSG sometimes ago? OK, its me and am back with my praise report.
With mixed feelings I went for the HSG! Mehn! It was a bit painful but all thanks to the radiologist who is a true believer, she was like a mother, she was really gentle and kept encouraging me. (God bless her). The result came back very good.

I saw the doctor the next day and he ask me to go for hormonal profile and my honey boo boo for sperm analysis.
With anxiety and all I wanted for cycle day 21 for the blood sample to be taken for the test. And hubby went for his sperm analysis. Hubby was diagnosed with low sperm motility and he was placed on Vitamin E. Can  low sperm motility be corrected?

For me, I waited for more than a month for my hormonal profile result to be ready. Mehn! I didn't know it will take that long. There were days I couldn't sleep, thinking and worrying for nothing!
Finally, result was ready. All hormones shooting very well expect progesterone which was within the range but not too good. I was placed on clomid and metformin.
I trust God that He will complete what He has started in us. And I know I will come to this page I share my testimony.

For someone trusting God for the fruit of the womb, abeg go see a doctor so that your prayer will be properly directed, know what you want God to correct! 
And

My Husband's Friend In Love With Him, What Should I Do?

Hello Anty, I know you want to rest till July but this can't wait o, I need advice on how to tackle this challenge from my husbands friend, please help me , also keep my ID from readers. I have been married to my hubby for 11 years, he has a close friend , I know very well that my husband looks at this lady as a friend but she is in love my husband , she will call at anytime of the day, even at midnight just to say say hello and know how hubby's day was .

 I have  told my

Wives Stop Doing These Contd

 Don’t act like your spouse is a mind reader. Instead, be specific about
 ; your requests. One busy mom said that she used to feel overwhelmed with
 t; household chores, wishing her spouse would help her. She now realizes that
> the only way he knows her needs is when she tells him. “Most often,” she
> says, “when I simply say, ‘Honey, will you tuck the kids in tonight while I
> get the kitchen cleaned up,’ he is glad to help.” She’s discovered that a
> few words are all it takes “to change a resentment-filled, stressed-out
> night into a team-effort bonding time.” Just ask..

 12. Stop putting housework ahead of hubby. One young mom told her husband
> that she didn't want to make love one night because she had just changed thesheets and she wanted them to stay clean. What do you think that response
> said to her husband? Another woman, who puts her husband ahead of the
> housework, said: “Do not leave the unfolded laundry on your marriage bed.

13. Put an end to taking the lead because

About His Status, Will The Catholic Church Agree To Wed Us?

Hello good people, Please I need your help and
advice. I am in love with an amazing man. he is so good to me and very
mature. He is going through a divorce (according to him) his family is
abroad. My problem here is he is 16 years older than I am, I am 27 years
old and secondly I don't know if the Catholic Church will wed us cos of his
status.

He says he wants to be married to me but I am sometimes worried
whether he is being honest with me about the divorce.

 Please I will like
advice as I am so worried cos its hard for me to even
like another and honestly I am not getting any younger. Thank you so very
much

Dear Wives, Stop Doing These NOW

The simple things wife shld stop doing to their husbands:
Have you ever wondered what your words and actions say to your husband about your love for him?
It is very important for U to consider ur husband’s needs and always guard urself against the use of careless words, attitudes, and actions so that U can get the best of him. Funny yeah?
I asked some of my married friends on our group on BBM “What they think a wife should stop doing if she wants to improve her marriage" and this list is based on some of their responses.

1. Stop thinking that your way is the “right” way. If he does something differently, it does not mean that it’s wrong. When a wife insists on having her own way, she is in essence saying, “I have to be in control.”

2. Don’t put others before your husband. It's not wise when when you put your mother, a friend, or even a child before your spouse. Actually, you take a step (often unintentional) toward isolation in your marriage. If you choose, for example, to

I Still Feel Pain After 10 Hours. I Need Help

I have been a silent reader on your blog for over a Year now. I enjoy ur blog a lot. Thanks for the good work please keep it up. Please hide my email add. Am a new wife got married to the most amazing man on earth who is very understanding and God fearing. We kept our self till after marriage. The thing now is any time we make love and he wants to make love from behind me  its always very painful_ almost as if his dick is touching my womb.

 I can still feel pain from inside me almost after 10hours ago that we made love (ave only had 1 boyfriend who deflowered and left me back in d days so from 2010 till I got married no one else has slept with me). 

My husband has noticed

Am I Being Selfish? Please Guide

Ok errrmmm....i'd like your opinion/advice and that of WC family on this issue bothering me.
I'd like to remain anonymous. My fiance and i had this talk recently and for the first time we couldnt agree on a particular issue.

Just this year, he rented an apartment and bought a car and about two of his friends moved in with him almost immediately and about 2 others have come visiting for about 2 weeks and left. Bottomline is, as one friend leaves another comes in. Am not so comfortable with that and i had a talk with him, asking him if this is gonna continue when we get married and he said yes!. I was shocked and told him that i would like to live a private life when am married. Am not saying i cant help people but not having people crawl all over the place.

He then explained that when he came to Lagos, the 1st person he stayed with accomodated 6 of them and when he was about getting married he told them to leave, but that about 3 of them had nowhere to go so
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