Sunday, July 02, 2017

Nigerian wives out there,please tell me the truth If I'm a terrible wife like my husband says...

I have been married for 4 years now and blessed with two kids. My husband nags a lot. If am sick he will nag that I'm the cause of it and won't take me to the hospital, all he would say is I won't spend my money in the hospital. As clean as my house is, it's not clean enough for him. If he comes back from work and I ask how his day was he will respond like am disturbing him. But if I go out and
come back he will complain that I did not even ask how he's doing or how he managed with the kids. He says am not a perfect mother, am not a perfect wife and can't manage my life even my business. 

This is a man that is not always at home.  Please wives out there am I that bad? He always complains to his brother about me and when his brother calls to ask me what happened am like 'we are fine no problem', but his brother will tell me 'your husband just complained about you'.  
Abeg wives out there am I doing anything wrong?


  1. Hi Poster, you are not a terrible wife. Every wife deserves an award especially those who get no help with the kids and chores. Your husband needs to be left with the kids for longer to experience what you go through daily, so he'll have that consciousness. He is not a bad husband either but just doesn't have that 'consciousness' yet. He goes to work, earns the money and because you are not paid for serving the whole family, it seems to him like you are just there as one of his liabilities and all. You are doing great managing your family and taking care of oga hubby because truth is that men are like kids, they need to also be taken care of, pampered, cooked for, advised, encouraged and much more. If he truly thinks you are terrible like that, he wouldn't have chosen to spend the rest of his life with you. He knows he needs you but cannot just bring himself to tell you that.

  2. ur hubby is just stressed out
    ignore his nags and try to be happy no matter what

  3. Pryncess PerebJuly 02, 2017

    Sometimes it could be that he might be facing some challenges at work or somewhere and he is now transferring his aggression on u. My dear wife,I will advice u stay calm,pray about the whole situation and ask God to help u.
    The next thing u should do is to tell ur hubby u want to talk to him and u must b serious about it. Now try to remind him of how u were before d whole saga,how loving he is and make him understand how much u want to please him. Try not to argue wit him in anyway becos he may want to prove u wrong but don't let it stop u from from expressing yourself/feelings. Don't worry much OK because this is a phase in ur marriage that you have to face and overcome. I pray the Lord grants u understanding more concerning your hubby.

  4. I think you should give him space, summer is around the corner travel to anywhere for 2 weeks and see the results. My husband did the same until I travel to Lagos for Easter with my kids, he was even the one begging me to come back.

  5. AnonymousJuly 03, 2017

    Don't mind him. That's how they behave. A lot of us are on that same thing. Abeg free yourself and be happy. Don't bother trying to please him again and let him see it for himself... Abeg be happy for yourself. U will still feel bad sometimes o but shake it off real quick. YOLO.

  6. AnonymousJuly 04, 2017

    Enter your comment...not all men will beg you oo

  7. Ify DanielsJuly 10, 2017

    My Dear sister you're not a bad wife ok! Most men are like that,any little thing makes them react mostly when they had a stressful day at work or have no money at the moment. Maybe you're the stay home wife who does little or nothing to support the home financially. It could also be as a result of the kind of friends he keeps and what they discuss about women and how they rate them. Also another factor could be his background,does his father love and respect his mother? I'll suggest you re-brand yourself,start doing those things that makes him happy,cook his best meals for him,ensure the house is always tidy before he returns,always smile and welcome him with a hug and kiss whenever he returns from work while dressed attractively;men are big babies they love petting and attention, ignore his numerous nagging. just continue showing him love and I bet you he'll change someday,donot keep things in mind against him...and last but not the least PRAYER! Ensure you pray for your hubby,children,marriage everyday. The devil hates a happy home so he'll try to do everything possible to frustrate it. Your hubby needs Christ. Do everything you can to make sure he goes to church with you. it takes a man who has genuinely encountered Christ as his Saviour to love, respect and be faithful to his wife. May God bless your home.

  8. Neloshalo.comJuly 10, 2017

    i will recommend you get your hubby to watch the Nigerian movie 'Mr and Mrs' (featuring Nse ikpe Etim and Joseph Benjamin). in fact, watch it with him. It tackles these sort of issue. It may be a function of how your husband was raised, to not appreciate women.

  9. Helo dear jst keep on praying and plz go and look 4 dis movie titled war room i bet u if u and ur husband watched it his marital life will never remain the same again.

  10. Agbaje Muh'dJuly 10, 2017

    I have just pass through that stage too and overcome it. Let her be calm pray and watch out, for the man will use his own mouth to tell what was wrong during the trial days. This usually come within the early years of marriage just overlook his nags and concentrate on your family growth and prayer s, he will be transform from boy to the man you want and beg for his mistakes.

  11. Adaji Iye RahabJuly 10, 2017

    You are not a bad wife and not a bad mother, you can never be a bad mother to your children it's not possible what you should do is to totally ignore him and must time keep your self busy not to break down and must importantly you must be prayerful.


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