Financial infidelity occurs when couples with combined finances lie to each other about money. For example, one partner may hide significant debts in a separate account while the other partner is unaware.
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Many of us will have friends where the wife goes shopping and hides new shoes in the wardrobe pretending they are old ones, while the husband underplays his salary at the same time.
“In reality, keeping your finances secret is usually detrimental. Keeping the size of one’s wealth private from friends is considered no more than polite society demands. But now a study has found that one in seven middle-aged couples keeps their earnings secret from each other.
Many of those questioned by The Telegraph admitted they kept quiet in order to buy treats for themselves, while others revealed they had set aside money in
case of divorce. And a third of those concealing their true salaries purposefully lied to their partners to throw them off the scent, according to Prudential, the insurer.
Other people questioned in the survey admitted to secret savings “stashes.
Vince Smith-Hughes, retirement income expert at Prudential, said: “The reasons for keeping quiet may seem perfectly valid, and coming clean may result in some awkward conversations, but couples should be very wary of keeping elements of their finances secret from each other.
The survey, which took views from 1,851 people over 40, did show some evidence of altruism: one in four respondents said they used deception so they could buy things for their partner. The survey also found 22 per cent were savings for a dream holiday, new car or another family. However, far more respondents said they had their own interests at heart. More than a quarter of those concealing cash – the highest proportion – claimed this was necessary to maintain “independence”. The study found 24 per cent planned to “buy things for themselves” and one in five were making contingency plans “in case we ever split up”. Just 6 per cent said they were funding another partner or family, and 8 per cent said they didn’t trust their partner to spend wisely. One in eight couples over 40 had secret debts.
Caroline Hawkesley, director of financial advisers Evolve, said: “Keeping finances separate is fairly common and can indicate any number of things – it could be a crack in the relationship but equally a partner might be fearful that their future spouse would find their wealth off-putting.
According to Fox, Millions of Americans are keeping financial secrets from their spouses, according to a new report.
A survey from creditcards.com estimates that as many as 13 million Americans have either a secret bank account or a secret credit card their partners don’t know about.
But while buying that new pair of shoes might be exciting in the moment, making secret purchases could have harmful consequences for your relationship, warns personal finance expert Chris Hogan.
Do you think Nigerian spouses also keep financial secrets?