Updated: Dear Pregnant Mom, Your Mail Vanished

I wanted to post with a phone very early this morning. Copied and do not know what my finger touched next thing, the mail disappeared. I must have unconsciously touched a button or something. I spent the whole morning looking for this mail cos from the tone I guess you are a first time mom (inexperienced), who wants to do what is right for you and  baby but mom won’t let you and now you seem confused.

From the little I can remember, your mother wants you to dump the car and use public transport cos according to her driving is not good for the baby. She has stopped you from bending to sweep and suggests that your husband helps out but you feel he has been doing great since you got pregnant and now it seems he is over stretched and you don’t know how to help out.From your mum’s rules, all you need to do now is just rest so as not to stress the baby.

You are worried cos you can’t stay in a dirty environment and now you are not expected to bend down and sweep. I know there are other questions you asked but can’t remember clearly now.
Please Aunty mom, if you still have the mail, resend to enable me publish or update here.

In the meantime, we have a post already that addresses some of your questions like
should a pregnant woman bend to sweep the floor and I know that a lot of pregnant women sweep even up to their EDD, I remember Ace talking about women in the village who farm, bend to cut grass until some even go to farm at 9 months but we all know sha that bodies are different. I don’t think even Doctors and midwives discourage bending to sweep but your body might be different from other preggers. For me o, I sweep but not with the short broom, there are some brooms that enable sweep and even pack while standing. There’s
another  post on
Can I sleep on my stomach while pregnant
 Please read the two posts above, you can also read Nigerian meal suited for a pregnant palate and
I need help with pregnancy stretch marks for driving, I have never heard that driving to work (short distance ) is stressful for any unborn child. Like you wrote in your mail, public transport is more stressful unless you want to be taking taxis to and fro until you are delivered of the baby.
When you resend, I promise to update ok? So sorry. Ok, I just remembered your fear of weight gain while pregnant and you are afraaid you do not know what and how to eat so as to retain your normal weight and you need advise.

The Mail:
Good day Eya, I am one of you anonymous blog visitor and I appreciate your work.                                          I need some advice from you and other blog visitors.                                                      I just found out am pregnant; Hubby and I are so overjoyed and grateful to God.                                                    Since I told my Mum, she has been giving series of advice such as: I should stop bending down, stop driving, stop eating several food, stop sex etc.             The thing is I don’t have a help and my husband has been very helpful but I feel am over stretching him now..                I  still need to clean, tidy the home and cook.. I just can’t wait for him to pick things from the floor..                               My mum asked me to dump the car and use public transport for now which I feel is even more stressful! I drive 30 minutes to the office.                                     I also have mild back pain; is this normal for early pregnancy? I also have whitish discharge. Is this okay?.                My mom wants to send some herbal remedies for the back pain, is this safe too.. I heard there’s really nothing Doctors can do at this early stage, I just take pregnancare and eat well. Please I will like to hear from experienced mums.. Does driving have any effect? Bending down, certain foods I should avoid or eat. This is my first pregnancy and am so clueless.  eat a lot now because am always hungry. If I don’t eat, I have stomach cramps! Should I eat as it comes or ignore since I fear to be overweight. I weigh 70kg now.Thank you

17 thoughts on “Updated: Dear Pregnant Mom, Your Mail Vanished”

  1. Poster, your mom eh? are you her only daughter? She is too protective of you. I drove until I went on maternity leave and my baby is as healthy and chubby as Prince Williams.

    Reply
  2. Madam it is not everything your mother advices you to do that you do after all she is not a doctor. If you dont want to bend down to sweep pls use a long broom. You can drive as long as you are comfortable with it. You can have sex for as long as you want. Yes there are certain foods you shouldnt eat you should ask your doctor. If i were you I would abstain from taking any herbs and get your husband to massage your back from time to time

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  3. Anty Eya,thanks oh,am also a pregnant mom with my second child my mother in law is with me and sometimes its not easy,she says I shouldn't carry my daughter cos make her sick with my pregnancy,she has a whole list of things that am just tired of the whole thing,complains to her son because she wants me to do things according to her way eg I shouldn't brush my 3 yr old daughter s teeth I should use a clean cloth to wipe them even want as far as saying they where all black which isn't true, she blames me when my daughter is sick

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  4. All these MIL palava. I pray to be a good MIL when my time comes so help me God. Sorry dear, please make yourself happy in your home άήδ be patient till she leaves.

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  5. Your mum is only bn caring. Parents overprotect their daughters especially first timers. My dad (God rest his soul) gave several dos and dont when i was pregnant. He wld call me everyday just to know how i feel. I miss his care.

    I will advise that you dont stop driving bcos public transport will stress you more. I passed my driving when i was pregnant (abt 7months) and i still drove towards my delivery. Pregnancy is not sickness neither is it disability. Appreciate her when she advises you but do what you think works for you. Its not disobedience. You dont have to tell her all you do.
    Do house chores as your body allows. Don't leave it all for ur hubby cos ur mum says so.
    I didn't sweep when i was pregnant but used d hoover so i cant advise on dt.
    Also, sign up on baby centre or download the app. Its full of helpful information.
    Above all, dont take any herbal remedy. It does more harm than good. Pls and pls dont take anything herbal. Its either you collect it from her and throw away or tell her ur doctor disapproves of it.

    Safe delivery.

    Reply
  6. This is where your hubby should come in. He should be able to tell his mum to let you be so that you can enjoy your pregnancy.
    I'm nt saying you should be rebellious but you should draw the line respectly somewhere.
    My MIL stayed with us for 3 months when i had my baby and i madesure i drew the line. I didn't let her overbear me. I remember an incident when MIL was complaining dt i didn't wear cap for my baby. She has always complained abt it bt my baby didn't like it moreso it gave him rashes. Hubby told her off immediately. He told her to let me the mum and bring my child up the way i wish to. That was d last time she mentioned the cap palava.
    Don't always keep quiet. When MIL tells me to do something, i ask her for the rationale behind it and if her reasons are not convincing, i throw it out of the window.

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  7. I'm curently 8months preggy, I drive myslf.I sweep my house I wash huby cloths with my hands. 4d hunger pangs pls eat oo. Forgt weight gain cs u must add. I ws 58kg before pregnancy now I'm 72. Tho I'm told I'll loose d weight after delivry. Pls dnt tk any herbal drugs to avoid malformation. Lastly ur mom is jst bin protective, hear her out bt always consult ur Dr b4 any step. No worry as ur prgnancy grows u go hear advise tire frm friends and foes, do dis don't do that. If in doubt u cn always google. Information is power my dear. Enjoy

    Reply
  8. Ur Lucky ur husband is supportive,not everyone is that lucky. I passed through hell when I had my first child when she came around,I mostly keep quiet and not use the advice but she finds a way to report me that sounds so convincing that you go fear. He believes her,I just need somewhere to. Verify what she says cos sometimes Google doesn't help much.

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  9. Aww,all we have here are wonderful mum's and counsellor's,good job my fellow WC and to u my dear pooster,bending down at this early age to sweep will not do anything to ur baby,is even when u are nearing ur EDD that is alittle bit though to sweep depending on the kind of broom u are using. As for sex,ask ur doctor if is save cos I have a friend that when ever she gets preggy and have sex at the early stage she ends up having misscarrage untill she went and meet a doc who told her to stop having sex at the early stage but as for me oh hmm even if na today the belle enter I go do am sharply sharply without any shakement.

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  10. Pls do the housework that you have the energy to do and leave the rest for another day. Don't overstretch yourself. Drive when you can. Avoid sex for the first 3months. It can cause a miscarriage. If you no fit hold body, abeg do the do. Above all, every pregnancy is different, so do what works for you!

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  11. Am also 35 weeks pregnant and I stil bend down to sweep,if I dont,who will?i don't av a house girl,hubby goes to work and only does house work on weekends,i have a 2 yrs plus baby in d house that litters everywhere every now and then,and my sitting room is covered with rug which only broom can sweep except hoover which I don't have.i refuse taking herbs this time,i did during my first time,so I want to know what happens if I dont.so dear,your mum is being caring but u just have to do what's convenient for you.though I stopped driving long distance since 28 weeks because it just became inconvenient for me.Above all,i wish u safe delivery.

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  12. Am also 35 weeks pregnant and I stil bend down to sweep,if I dont,who will?i don't av a house girl,hubby goes to work and only does house work on weekends,i have a 2 yrs plus baby in d house that litters everywhere every now and then,and my sitting room is covered with rug which only broom can sweep except hoover which I don't have.i refuse taking herbs this time,i did during my first time,so I want to know what happens if I dont.so dear,your mum is being caring but u just have to do what's convenient for you.though I stopped driving long distance since 28 weeks because it just became inconvenient for me.Above all,i wish u safe delivery.

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  13. Biko, don't take any herb o, cos it may affect the formation of ur child. When I was pregnant I did EVERYTHING and I fink it has to do wif a gene thing, cos wen my mum was pregnant, she was pounding(tho in the third trimester), washing, she evn drove herself to the hospital, wen she was in labour.. I guess that made things easy for her, and she deliveRed within 3hrs. And she sed that was the longest labour time she had. That the rest of us took her maybe like 30mins-1hr labour, after she was dicharged, she drove to the market straight from the hospital, bla bla…My point is ask ur mum, wat pregnancy was like for her, was she sweeping and working, all those things. Wen u r tired, jst stop.

    Reply
  14. Speak to your doctor about your concerns because what works for a woman here may not be the best for you. please grow a backbone concerning your mother unless she will continue to dictate for you. God bless

    Reply

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